Shared residence is best for children
Quantitative and Longitudinal Studies - 126 citations
We have found 126 citations to published research showing that
shared residence is better for children than any other kind of post-divorce
residence.
Sole residence is justified on the basis of Attachment Theory. Attachment
Theory suggests that stability and secure emotional attachments are
crucial to a child’s emotional development. However (as we discuss
in a later section) sole residence is an incorrect interpretation
of Attachment Theory.
It is understandable why the Family Court initially gave Attachment
Theory such primary significance in the 1970’s. Then there were
few divorces and even fewer children in shared residence. With no
facts, the court had to make decisions on theory alone.
However the last 30 years has seen vast numbers of children grow
up in a wide variety of family circumstances and now, finally, there
is an impressive number of large, well controlled and often longitudinal
studies that compare whether children in shared residence actually
do better, or worse in life, than children with a single parent. These
studies record whether they reached their potential at school, whether
they had emotional and behavioural problems, whether they had problems
with drugs or teenage pregnancy, whether they have begun successful
careers and so on…
These studies clearly demolish the idea that one primary parent
and one primary home is preferable than having a meaningful relationship
with both their natural parents.
So at last we can compare FACT with THEORY, and Attachment THEORY
has been shown to be lacking. It is clear that having a meaningful
relationship with dad is a greater benefit than any instability caused
by having two houses.
Understandably is impossible to prove that 50-50 is better than
49-51. The research generally uses the concept of a ‘meaningful’
relationship with both parents. This is explored in a later section,
but the Family Court’s standard every second weekend regime
is clearly insufficient to maintain a meaningful relationship.
Longitudinal studies [18 citations]
# A huge 33 year study tracked the lives of 17,000 individuals
born in 1958. The study released in March 2002 found that close paternal
involvement not only improves academic performance but also relationships
and health. The benefits are greatest for youngsters who establish
a strong bond from at least the age of seven. The highest scorers
performed best at school, socially and in their marital relationships.
After inspection of all the factors influencing a child’s later
marital success, such as mental health, academic achievement and emotional
behaviour, the influence of a father was most telling. Daughters benefiting
from a strong paternal bond were less likely to have mental health
problems and boys were less likely to get into trouble with the police.
Flouri E, Buchanan A. What Predicts Good Relationships With Parents
In Adolescence And Partners In Adult Life. Paper XXV International
Congress of Applied Psychology. Singapore (July 7-12 2002).
See also,
-
Flouri E, Buchanan A, Bream A. Adolescents’ Perceptions
Of Their Fathers’ Involvement: Significance To School Attidudes.
29 Psychology In Schools (2002) pp 575-582;
-
Flouri E, Buchanan A. Childhood Predictors Of Labor Force Participation
In Adult Life. 23 Journal of Family and Economic Issues (2002) pp
101-120;
-
Flouri E, Buchanan A, Ten Beinke J. Emotional And Behavioural
Problems In Childhood And Distress In Adult Life: Risk And Protective
Factors. 36 Australian and New Zealand Journal of Psychiatry (2002)
pp 521-527;
-
Flouri E, Buchanan A. Father Involvement In Childhood And Trouble
With The Police In Adolescence: Findings From The 1958 British Birth
Cohort. 17Journal of Interpersonal Violence (2002) pp 689-701;
-
Flouri E, Buchanan A. Life Satisfaction In Teenage Boys: The Moderating
Role Of Father Involvement And Bullying. 28 Aggressive Behavior
(2002) pp 126-133;
-
Flouri E, Buchanan A. The Protective Role Of Parental Involvement
In Adolescent Suicide. 23 Crisis (2002) pp 17-22;
-
Flouri E, Buchanan A. What Predicts Good Relationships With Parents
In Adolescence And Partners In Adult Life: Findings From The 1958
British Birth Cohort. 16 Journal of Family Psychology (2002) pp
186-198
# In the Impact of Divorce Project of Ohio’s Kent State University––the
first nationwide sample study of 699 elementary students from 38 American
states––children from divorced homes performed more poorly
in reading, spelling, and maths, and repeated a grade more frequently
than did children in intact two parent families.
-
the effects of divorce are not temporary stressors but rather
long-term influences,
-
boys have more difficulties, particularly as they approach adolescence,
-
the decline in socio-economic status after divorce is not a explanation
for children's decreased performance, and
-
authoritative child-rearing routines such as bedtimes, mealtimes,
and television viewing habits relate to better child outcomes.
One of the most striking findings was that 51% of children from
sole mother custody families see their fathers once or twice a year
or never. Even 11 or 12 years following the divorce, adolescents who
have good relationships with their non-custodial fathers have fewer
school behaviour problems, fewer attention or aggression problems,
higher grades in Language and Social Studies, and are less likely
to abuse drugs or alcohol.
Guidubaldi J. Differences In Children's Divorce Adjustment Across
Grade Level and Gender: A Report From the NASP-Kent State Nationwide
Project. In Wolchik, Karoly (Editors), Children of Divorce: Perspectives
and adjustment. Lexington Books, Lexington, MA (1989) pp 185-231.
See also:
Guidubaldi J, Perry J D, Nastasi B K. Growing Up In A Divorced Family:
Initial and Long-Term Perspectives On Children's Adjustment. In S.
Oskamp (Editor), Applied Social Psychological Annual. (7) Family Processes
and Problems: Social Psychology Aspects. Sage, Newbury Park, California
(1987);
Guidubaldi J. The Legacy of Lost Families: Divorce and The Next
Generation. The World, I, (Nov 1988) pp 520-534.
# Boys in joint residence reported fewer negative life experiences
after divorce than boys in maternal residence
Cowan D B. Mother Custody Versus Joint Custody: Children’s
Paternal Relationships and Adjustment (1982). Dissertation Abstracts
International, 43A, 726, UMI order number, 82-18213.
# “Girls without a father in their life are two and a half
times as likely to get pregnant and 53 percent more likely to commit
suicide. Boys without a father in their life are 63 percent more likely
to run away and 37 percent more likely to abuse drugs. Both girls
and boys are twice as likely to drop out of high school, twice as
likely to end up in jail and nearly four times as likely to need help
for emotional or behavioural problems.”
US Bureau of Justice Statistics. Survey of State Prison Inmates.
US Bureau of Justice, Washington D C (1991)
Davidson N. Life Without Father. Policy Review (1990)
# Low parenting time for either parent will lead to adjustment
problems later for the child.
Lund M. Parenting Arrangements In Divorce: Implications of Children’s
Different Developmental Needs. Psychiatric Office, Family Law Section
Los Angeles Superior Court (1996).
Kelly J B, Lamb M E. Using Child Development Research To Make Appropriate
Custody and Access Decisions. 38 Family and Conciliation Court’s
Review (2000) pp 297-311
# A thirty-six year longitudinal study in the U.S. found that the
children of affectionate fathers were much more likely in their forties
to be happily married and mentally healthy and to report good relationships
with friends
Franz C E, McClelland D C, Weinberger J. Childhood Antecedents
of Conventional Social Accomplishments In Midlife Adults: A thirty-Six
year Prospective Study. 60 Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
(1991) pp 586-595.
# Furthermore, the child with an available father, both in the early
and the adolescent years, is more companionable and responsible as
adults.
Warshak R A. The Custody Revolution: The Father Factor and The Motherhood
Mystique. Simon, Schuster, New York (1992)
Snarey J. How Fathers Care For The Next Generation. Harvard University
Press, Cambridge MA (1993) pp 163-164
# Even after controlling for income it has been found that children
whose parents are divorced or separated have lower levels of educational
attainment than children from intact families.
Guidubaldi J, Cleminshaw H K, Perry J D, McLoughlin C S. The Impact
of Parental Divorce On Children: Report of The Nation-Wide NASP Study.
12 School Psychological Review (1983) pp 300-323
Spruijt E, de Goede R. Transitions In Family Structure and Adolescent
Well-Being. 32 Adolescence (1997) pp 897-911
# A longitudinal study of males found that the divorce of parents
before the children were aged ten was one of the major predictors
of adolescent delinquency and adult criminality.
Farrington D P. Implications of Criminal Career Research For The
Prevention of Offending. 13 Journal of Adolescence (1990) pp 93-113
# By the age of thirteen there is an average difference of half
a year in reading abilities between children of divorced parents and
those from intact families.
Stevenson J, Fredman G. The Social Correlates of Reading Ability.
31 Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry (1990) pp 689-690
# Children raised in intact families complete more total years
of education and have higher earnings than children from other family
structures
Hardy J B, et al. Self-Sufficiency At Ages 27-33 Years: Factors
Present Between Birth and 18 Years That Predict Educational Attainment
Among Children Born to Inner-City Families. 59 Paediatrics (1997)
pp 80-87
Heiss J. Effects of African American Family Structure On School
Attitudes and Performance. 43 Social Problems (1996) pp 246-264
# The divorce of parents reduces the likelihood of attaining a
university education. Studies indicate among women who completed university
there was a massively lower divorce rate (88 percent lower) among
their parents compared to women who did not get a college degree.
Bumpass L L, Castro Martin T, Sweet J A. The Impact of Family Background
and Early Marital Factors On Marital Disruption. 12 Journal of Family
Issues (1991) pp 22-42.
# Among university-age students who went to the same high schools
in affluent Marin County, San Francisco, only two thirds of the children
from divorced families attended university, compared with 85 percent
of students from intact families.
Wallerstein J S. The Long Term Effects of Divorce On Children:
A Review. 30 Journal of The American Academy of Child Adolescent Psychiatry
(1991) pp. 349-360
Other quantitative studies [69 citations]
These comparative studies compare children in sole parent household
to children in other household types, and show that sole residence
is the worst kind of residential situation for children.
# The United States Congress has found:
(1) Nearly 24,000,000 children in the United States, or 34 percent
of all such children, live apart from their biological father.
(2) Sixty percent of couples who divorce have at least 1 child.
(3) The number of children living with only a mother increased
from just over 5,000,000 in 1960, to 17,000,000 in 1999, and between
1981 and 1991 the percentage of children living with only 1 parent
increased from 19 percent to 25 percent.
(4) Forty percent of children who live in households without a
father have not seen their father in at least 1 year and 50 percent
of such children have never visited their father's home.
(5) The most important factor in a child's upbringing is whether
the child is brought up in a loving, healthy, supportive environment.
(6) Children who live without contact with their biological father
are, in comparison to children who have such contact,
-
5 times more likely to live in poverty;
-
more likely to bring weapons and drugs into the classroom;
-
twice as likely to commit crime;
-
twice as likely to drop out of school;
-
more likely to commit suicide;
-
more than twice as likely to abuse alcohol or drugs; and
-
more likely to become pregnant as teenagers.
(7) Violent criminals are overwhelmingly males who grew up without
fathers.
(15) For the future of the United States and the future of our
children, Congress, States, and local communities should assist
parents to become more actively involved in their children's lives.
US Senate S.657- Strengthening Families Act of 2003
# Many researchers support the conclusion that children in joint
residence situations do have a much better prognosis for positive
post-divorce adjustment
Roman M, Haddad W. The Disposable Parent: The Case For Joint Custody.
Holt, Reinhart, Winston, New York (1978) at 178.
Coller D R. Joint Custody; Research, Theory and Policy. 27(4) Family
Process (December 1988) pp 259-269
Kruk E. Promoting Shared Parenting After Separation; A Therapeutic/Interventionist
Model of Family Mediation. 15(3) Journal of Family Therapy (August
1993)
Thompson R. The Role of The Father After Divorce. 4(1) The Future
of Children. (1994) pp 210-235.
# Children in joint residence were better adjusted than children
in sole-residence. Children in joint residence were better adjusted
than children in sole residence settings, but no different from those
in intact families. Factors including, general adjustment, family
relationships, self–esteem, emotional and behavioural adjustment,
and divorce specific adjustment were considered. Moreover, joint residence
parents reported less current conflict than did sole residence parents.
Joint residence can be advantageous for children, by facilitating
ongoing positive involvement with both parents
Doll B (June 1995). Preliminary Summary: Empirical Research Describing
Outcomes Of Joint Custody American Psychological Association, Washington
D.C.
Bauserman R. (2002) Child Adjustment In Joint Custody Verses Sole-Custody
Arrangements: A Meta-Analytic Review. 16(1) Journal Of Family Psychology
# Reviews of the evidence on post-divorce adjustment indicate the
importance of a continuing meaningful relationship with both parents.
Kelly J B. Examining Resistance To Joint Custody. In, J Folberg
(Editor), Joint Custody and Shared Parenting The Guildford Press (2nd
edition), New York (1991) pp 55-62. (See Appendix D for a transcript)
Lerman I A. Adjustment of Latency Age Children In Joint and Single
Custody Arrangements. Dissertation Abstracts International, 50B, 3704,
Order No AAC8925682 (1989)
# Equal groups in joint guardianship, sole maternal residence and
joint residence were compared and the amount of father-child contact
were found to be significant predicators of child adjustment, with
higher father-child contact associated with better adjustment of the
children. The results in this study, as in the vast majority of this
research, suggest that joint residence is much more beneficial for
successful post-divorce adjustment of children than sole residence.
Lerman I A. Adjustment of Latency Age Children In Joint and Single
Custody Arrangements. Dissertation Abstracts International, 50B, 3704,
Order No AAC8925682 (1989)
# Steinman evaluated 24 couples who chose joint residence arrangements
for their children at divorce. The children felt that they were strongly
attached to both parents and were not were not troubled by the loyalty
conflicts. A comparatively low rate of the children experiencing confusion
or anxiety to their shared residence arrangement. Consequently the
argument that children in joint residence experience more confusion
and frustration was not supported in that study.
Steinman S. The Experiences of Children In A Joint Custody Arrangement:
A Report of A Study. 51 American Journal of Orthopsychiatry (1981)
pp 403-414
# Goldstein also found children were strongly attached to both parents,
but a small number of these children felt a strong need to be fair
to both parents and were meticulous about dividing their time equally
between them. While these children did perceive their parents divorce
as undesirable, and in some cases harboured fantasies of reconciliation,
they did not experience the overwhelming sense of having been rejected
that is common in the more usual maternal sole residence/father-absent
post-divorce arrangement (Wallerstein, Kelly 1980; Mitchell 1985).
Goldstein J, Freud A, Solnit A. Beyond The Best Interests of The
Child. Free Press, New York (1973)
Wallerstein J S, Kelly J B. Surviving The Breakup: How Children
and Parents Cope With Divorce. Basic Books, New York (1980).
Mitchell A. Children In The Middle: Living Through Divorce. Tavistok
Publications, London, New York (1985)
# 70% of children (mostly boys) with severe behavioural handicaps
have no father contact at all. These children and adolescents are
often the most disturbed or potentially dangerous students in school.
Guidubaldi J, Duckworth J. Enhancing Fathers' Involvement In Child
Rearing: An Empirical Basis For Consultation and Parent Education.
Symposium presented at the National Association of School Psychologists
Annual Convention Atlanta, Georgia (March 1996).
# Father absence lowers cognitive test scores for young children
in general
Powel M, Parcel T L. Effects of Family Structure On The Earnings
Attainment Process: Differences By Gender, 59 Journal of Marriage
and the Family (1997) p 419, reporting on unpublished research by
Frank Mott (1993) prepared for NIH/NICHD.
# Father absence lowers girls’ math scores. Girl’s
verbal capacities increase when the father is present and especially
when he reads aloud to her when she is young.
Popenoe D. Life Without Father. Martin Kessler Books, New York
(1995)
# Paternal availability seems to be especially important in the
IQ performance of boys of all ages and girls in later latency.
Parke R. Fathers. Harvard University Press, Cambridge, Massachusetts
(1981)
# Boys in sole parent households frequently lack a positive male
role model and miss the discipline exercised by most fathers. Half
of Australian boys with separated parents see their fathers on the
average of only six times a year or less. It is clear that many boys
are being reared without benefit of a same-sex parental figure.
Australian Institute of Family Studies. Parents and Children After
Marriage Breakdown Study. Australian Institute of Family Studies Report,
Australian Publishing Service, Canberra (1991)
Australian Bureau of Statistics, 1997. Children, Australia: A Social
Report. Australian Bureau of Statistics. Catalogue 4119.0).
# If economic hardship were the main predictor of school performance,
there would presumably be no difference between children in step-parent
households and children in intact families where both family types
received similar incomes. Yet children in stepparent households still
generally perform less well, even after controlling for income.
Amato P R, Keith B. Parental Divorce and The Well-Being of Children:
A Meta-Analysis. 110 Psychological Bulletin (1991) pp 26-46
# Children in step families also suffer educationally. Schools
may expel as many as one in four stepchildren.
Dawson D A. Family Structure and Children's Health and Well Being:
Data From The 1988 National Survey of Child Health. 53 Journal of
Marriage and The Family (1995) pp. 573-584.
# Increased contacts in meaningful care giving situations, lead
to improved behaviour, improved peer relationships, more positive
self-esteem, and even improved academic scores in numerous subjects.
Infrequent paternal contact, on the other hand, has been associated
with poor self-esteem, depression, and high levels of anger in children
Kelly J B. Longer-Term Adjustment In Children of Divorce: Converging
Findings and Implications For Practice. 2 Journal of Family Psychology
(1988a) pp 119-140
# The argument that children in joint residence experience more
confusion and frustration was not supported. Based on this research
result, and many other similar studies, it is known now that the argument
that children need the stability of one home etc is not valid.
Luepnitz D. A. Maternal, Paternal, and Joint Custody: A Study of
Families After Divorce (1980). Doctoral dissertation, State University
of New York At Buffalo. UMI order number, 80-27618
# Children obtain emotional stability from important emotional
relationships with two parents and two sets of grandparents, and these
are much more important than where a child sleeps.
Kelly J B. Examining Resistance To Joint Custody. In, J Folberg
(Editor), Joint Custody and Shared Parenting. The Guildford Press
(2nd edition), New York (1991) pp 55-62
# Children in sole residence situations did not maintain strong
healthy emotional relationships with both parents, children in joint
residence situations did. The children in joint residence arrangements
indicated that they were generally satisfied with their level of involvement
with both parents, in marked contrast, children in sole residence
indicated that they were not satisfied.
• The claim that children of divorce need one primary parent
and one primary home is refuted.
• There was no evidence that joint residence families sustained
more post divorce conflict than sole residence households;
• There was no evidence that children experience disruption
from living in two houses. In fact, most children felt their new lifestyles
held certain advantages over the nuclear family household;
• Children in sole residence desired more contact with their
non-resident parents;
• Many non-resident parents but no joint residence parents lost
contact with their children;
• No joint residence fathers had ceased to support their children
financially, as many non-resident fathers had;
• Joint residence children had maintained meaningful relationships
with both parents, in contrast with single residence children for
whom the visit was a vacation;
• Single residence parents reported feeling burnt out and overwhelmed
in a way that joint residence did not.
• All of the joint residence children valued the arrangement
and said they would have chosen it. By contrast, half of the sole
residence children were dissatisfied with their arrangements and wanted
more contact with the non-resident parent.
• Children’s response to parental authority were not shown
to be adversely affected by the fact that their parents no longer
cared for each other. Joint residence should be a rebuttable presumption
at law. She concluded that joint residence at it's best is superior
to sole residence at its best.
Luepnitz D. A. Maternal, Paternal, and Joint Custody: A Study of
Families After Divorce (1980). Doctoral dissertation, State University
of New York At Buffalo. UMI order number, 80-27618
# There is a general consensus that children who are able to maintain
a loving, involved relationship with both parents after divorce adjust
much better than children who find their relationship with either
parent curtailed.
Kelly J B. Examining Resistance To Joint Custody. In, J Folberg
(Editor), Joint Custody and Shared Parenting. The Guildford Press
(2nd edition), New York (1991) pp 55-62
Cowan D B. Mother Custody Versus Joint Custody: Children’s
Paternal Relationships and Adjustment (1982). Dissertation Abstracts
International, 43A, 726, UMI order number, 82-18213.
Shiller V M. Joint Verses Maternal Custody For Families With Latency
Age Boys: Parent Characteristics and Child Development. 56(3) American
Journal of Orthopsychiatry (1986a) pp 486-489
Lerman I A. Adjustment of Latency Age Children In Joint and Single
Custody Arrangements. Dissertation Abstracts International, 50B, 3704,
Order No AAC8925682 (1989)
Ilfeld H Z. Children’s Perception of Their Relationships
With Their Fathers In Three Family Constellations: Mother Sole Custody,
Joint Custody, and Intact Families. Dissertation Abstracts International,
50B, 5318, Order Number ACC9003085 (1989)
# Children who fared best after the divorce were those who were
free to develop loving and full relationships with both parents. (Relationships
like this are unlikely without shared residence, ed.)
Folberg J, Graham M. Joint Custody of Children Following Divorce.
12 University of California Davis Law Review (1979) p 535
Family Law Council. Patterns of Parenting After Separation: A Report
To The Minister For Justice and Consumer Affairs. Australian Publishing
Service, Canberra (April 1992).
# Empirical and clinical evidence that shared residence encourages
responsible behaviour and is psychologically sound.
Roman M, Haddad W. The Disposable Parent: The Case For Joint Custody.
Holt, Rinehart, Winston, New York (1978)
Luepnitz D A. Child Custody: A Study of Families After Divorce.
Lexington Books, Massachusetts (1982
Coller D R. Joint Custody; Research, Theory and Policy. 27(4) Family
Process (December 1988) pp 259–269
Sharply C F, Webber R F. Co–Parenting: An Alternative To
Consider In Separation Counselling. 10(3) Australian Journal of Sex,
Marriage and Family (1992) pp 111–117
Kruk E. Promoting Shared Parenting After Separation; A Therapeutic/Interventionist
Model of Family Mediation. 15(3) Journal of Family Therapy (August
1993)
Thompson R. The Role of The Father After Divorce. 4(1) The Future
of Children. (1994) pp 210–235.
Farrell W. Father and Child Reunion: How To Bring The Dads We Need
To The Children We Love. Tarsher/Putman, New York (January 2001)
# Lately have we begun to understand that children suffer serious
negative consequences when fathers are marginalized.
Warshak R A. The Custody Revolution: The Father Factor and The Motherhood
Mystique. Simon, Schuster, New York (1992)
Farrell W. Father and Child Reunion: How To Bring The Dads We Need
To The Children We Love. Tarsher/Putman, New York (January 2001)
# The usual way of divorce (mother gets residence (custody), father
gets contact and financial obligation), is based on outmoded, erroneous,
and damaging concepts of men’s and women’s parenting roles,
abilities, and parent–child relationships.
Fitzgerald H, McCread C. Fathers and Infants. 2(4) Infant Mental
Health (1981).
Jacobs J W. Divorce and Child Custody Resolution: Conflicting Legal
and Psychological Paradigms. 143 American Journal of Psychiatry (1986)
pp 192–197
# Joint residence is the optimal post–divorce arrangement
and that courts should begin with a rebuttable presumption of joint
residence.
Roman M, Haddad W. The Disposable Parent: The Case For Joint Custody.
Holt, Rinehart, Winston, New York (1978)
# Children seem to benefit from increased time with the non-custodial
parent when certain conditions are met: low levels of inter-parental
conflict and a warm, consistent relationship with the non-custodial
parent. They benefit from authoritative parenting with the non-resident
parent (i.e., advice and help with projects, supervision of homework;
discipline)... In other words, how often fathers see their children
is less important than what they actually do with them. (Alternate
weekend access leads to destructive ‘Disney Dad’ relationships,
as fathers are forced to try to maximise the joy in their infrequent
visits – ed.)
Amato, Gilbreath, 1999; Clarke-Stewart, Hayward, 1996; Hetherington,
Cox, Cox, 1982
# Boys as a group are happier and show lower rates of delinquency
and school drop-out in father-custody homes. These results are consistent
and robust. There are no studies which find the reverse - that children
function better with the opposite-sex parent.
Camara, Resnick, 1988; Clarke-Stewart, Hayward, 1996; Gregory, 1965;
Peterson, Zill, 1986; Santrock, Warshak, 1979; Warshak, 1996; Warshak,
Santrock, 1983; Zimiles, Lee, 1991
# Researchers recommend that in a child’s best interests,
the job of the courts is to protect children from emotional damage
by safeguarding the child’s relationship with each parent to
the fullest extent possible
Williams F S. Child Custody and Parental Cooperation. Paper presented
at American Bar Association Family Law Section (1987).
Kelly J B (1988a). Longer-Term Adjustment In Children of Divorce:
Converging Findings and Implications For Practice. 2 Journal of Family
Psychology pp 119-140
# Continuing a broad based relationship with the child (eg joint
residence) considerably diminished the negative psychological effects
on the non-resident father and his child.
Greif J B. Fathers, Children and Joint Custody. 49 American Journal
of Orthopsychiatry (1979). pp 311-319 at 314
Luepnitz D A. Child Custody: A Study of Families After Divorce.
Lexington Books, Massachusetts (1982)
# Rejecting mandatory joint residence places the interests of parents
ahead of the best interests of the child
McIsaac H. The Divorce Revolution: A Critique. 10(5) California
Family Law Report (May 1986)
Kelly J B. Further Observations On Joint Custody. 16 University
of California Davis Law Review (1983) pp 762-770
# Australian data indicates the proportion of children with mental
health problems – including behavioural, affective (mood), and
attention deficit disorders – is lowest in intact families.
The highest proportion of children with problems occurs in single
parent households, but boys are most likely to suffer from mental
health problems in step/blended households.
Sawyer et al. The Mental Health of Young People in Australia. Mental
Health and Special Programs Branch, Department of Health and Aged
Care, Canberra (2000).
# In 1988, a survey of preschool children admitted to New Orleans
hospitals as psychiatric patients over a 34-month period found that
nearly 80 percent came from fatherless homes.
Block J et al. Parental Functioning and the Home Environment In
Families of Divorce. 27 Journal of the American Academy of Child and
Adolescent Psychiatry (1988)
# An important Australian study interviewed 402 Victorian children
and asked them about relationships with parents and their general
feelings about family life. It sought to connect their responses to
how the children were doing in their lives. For the broad range of
children support from both mothers and fathers was associated with
positive development. When fathers had little association with their
children, these children had relatively low self-esteem, strongly
desired more contact with their fathers, and were doing poorly compared
to other children whose fathers were more involved in their lives.
Amato P. Children In Australian Families: The Growth of Competence.
Prentice-Hall, Sydney (1987)
# The Western Australian Child Health Survey found that the proportion
of children with low academic competence was almost twice as high
for sole parent households as for couple families – 30% and
17% respectively
Zubrick S R, Silburn S R, Gurrin L, Teoh H, Shephard C, Carlton
J, Lawrence D. Western Australian Child Health Survey: Education,
Health and Competence. Australian Bureau of Statistics and The TVW
Telethon Institute For Child Health Research, Perth, Western Australia
(1997)
# Many studies have replicated the finding that boys fare much more
poorly than girls in post-divorce households.
Guidubaldi J, Cleminshaw H K, Perry J D, Nastasi B K, Lightel J.
The Role of Selected Family Environment Factors In Children’s
Post-Divorce Adjustment. 35 Family Relations (1986) pp 141-151
Krein S F, Beller A H. Educational Attainment of Children From
Single-Parent Families: Differences By Exposure, Gender and Race.
25 Demography (1988) pp 221-234
# Poor control of the custodial parent, inconsistency and family
disorganisation are often reported in single-parent households, and
lead to inattention ultimately resulting in poor performance on tasks
requiring sustained attention
Hetherington E, Cox M, Cox R. The Aftermath of Divorce. In Steven
and Mathews (Editors), Mother-Child, Father-Child Relations Washington
DC: National Association for the Education of Young Children (1978)
# Divorce affects the educational level that children attain. Among
girls who have completed high school there is a 33 percent lower divorce
rate among their parents compared to girls who drop out of high school
Bumpass L L, Castro Martin T, Sweet J A. The Impact of Family Background
and Early Marital Factors On Marital Disruption. 12 Journal of Family
Issues (1991) pp 22-42.
# Numerous authors have expressed concern about the injury to children
when a parent with psychological problems is given total responsibility
for the children. Decisions in favour of sole residence will result
in awarding residence to a small number of parents who have serious
psychological problems. Given the total authority which parents in
sole residence situations have, the potential for child abuse, in
that context, is almost unchecked.
Williams F S. Child Custody and Parental Cooperation. Paper presented
at American Bar Association Family Law Section (1987)
Wallerstein J S, Kelly J B. Surviving The Breakup: How Children
and Parents Cope With Divorce. Basic Books, New York (1980)
Kelly J B. Longer-Term Adjustment In Children of Divorce: Converging
Findings and Implications For Practice. 2 Journal of Family Psychology
(1988a) pp 119-140
# Available evidence suggests that both sole residence mothers and
sole residence fathers are guilty of that form of child abuse.
McMurray A, Blackmore A M. Influences On Parent-Child Relationships
On Non-Custodial Fathers. 14(3) Australian Journal of Marriage and
Family (1992) pp 151-159 at p153
Lovorn R. Why Women Join Fathers Rights Groups. Athens Banner Herald.
Athens Georgia (Thursday, 3 October 1991)
# These data could result from the increased stress associated
with single parent responsibilities, since the Ditson, Shay (1984)
data also indicated that in married families the abuse was evenly
split between the mother and the father.
Ditson J, Shay S. Use of A Home-Based Microcomputer To Analyse Community
Data From Reported Cases On Child Abuse and Neglect. 8 Child Abuse
and Neglect (1984) pp 503-509
# Child abuse is intimately related to later delinquency and violent
crime, and here too divorce is implicated.
Fagan P. The Child Abuse Crisis: The Disintegration of Marriage,
Family, and The American Community. The Heritage Foundation, Backgrounder
No. 1115 (3 June 1997)
# When parenting responsibilities are totally loaded totally on
one parent, sole residence may lead to increased parental stress,
and research has associated increased maternal stress with increased
violence against children.
Whimple E E. The Role of Parental Stress In Physically Abusive
Families. Dissertation Abstracts International, 50A, 3354, Order No
AAC900701 (1989)
Delinquency and crime [29 citations]
# It has also been found that boys from divorced families often
exhibit delinquent-like behaviour and have difficulty in controlling
their impulses (Biller 1981; Buckingham 2000). Investigators believe
that boys need a firm, positive identification with their fathers
in order to be able to develop internalised controls over their behaviour.
The fact that post divorce boys have much less contact with their
fathers would explain their higher incidence of delinquent-like and
generally aggressive behaviour.
Biller, H. Father Absence, Divorce and Personality Development:
The Role of the Father in Child Development. Wiley, Son, New York
(1981)
Buckingham, J. Boy Troubles – Understanding Rising Suicide,
Rising Crime and Educational Failure. Centre For Independent Studies,
St. Leonards, NSW (June 2003).
# Assault rates more than doubled in the decade from 1980 to 1990
and there is a statistical association between rising crime and rising
rates of divorce. (There is no such association between crime and
unemployment or the number of young men in society).
Intact families are generally the most effective way to socialise
the young. Disturbed behaviour among young people was noted during
World War II, when many fathers were away from their families. Sullivan
suggests that our present way of dealing with this problem, through
intervention at the individual level by social workers and the police,
has little effect, and calls for a public health approach, preventing
the problems before they occur by encouraging intact families.
Sullivan L. Rising Crime In Australia. Centre For Independent Studies,
Sydney (1997)
# The NSW Bureau of Crime Statistics and Research (BOCSR) implicates
child neglect is currently the most powerful social predictor of juvenile
crime.
Weatherburn D, Lind B. Social and Economic Stress, Child Neglect
and Juvenile Delinquency. NSW Bureau of Crime Statistics and Research,
Sydney (1997)
# “The high incidence of violent behaviour from boys was strongly
correlated to being fatherless but it was not, in my experience, prevalent
among any one community. It was not related to one race or community,
but it was related to having no father."
# Abuse has been shown to be related to violent juvenile crime,
but not to property crime
Farrington D F. The Family Backgrounds of Aggressive Youths, In
L Hersor, M Berger, D Shaffer (Editors), Aggression and Anti-Social
Behaviour In Child hood and Adolescence. Pergamon, Oxford (1978)
Patterson G R. Coercive Family Processes. Castalia, Eugene, Oregon
(1982)
Widom C S. The Cycle of Violence. 244 Science (1989) pp 160-166
# Children of divorced parents are significantly more likely to
be delinquent by age fifteen, regardless of when the divorce took
place, than are children of intact families
Frost A K, Pakiz B. The Effects of Marital Disruption On Adolescents:
Time As A Dynamic. 60(4) American Journal of Orthopsychiatry (1990)
pp 544-555. Hereinafter as Marital Disruption
# Adolescents from single-mother households are consistently more
likely to be delinquent than those from intact families, though the
same holds for children from intact conflict ridden families
Demo D H, Acock A C. The Impact of Divorce On Children. 50 Journal
of Marriage and The Family (1988) pp 619-648
# Among adolescent girls there is a strong correlation between
family structure and delinquency
Heimer K Gender, Interaction, Ad Delinquency: Testing A Theory of
Differential Social Control. 39 Social Psychology Quarterly (1996)
pp 39-61
# Among adolescent girls there is a strong correlation between family
structure and hostile behaviour
Pakiz B, Reinherz H ,z Giaconia R M. Early Risk Factors For Serious
Antisocial Behaviour At Age 21: A Longitudinal Community Study. 67
American Journal of Orthopsychiatry (1997) pp 92-100
# Among adolescent girls there is a strong correlation between
family structure and drug use, larceny, skipping school
Kalter N, Reimer B, Brickman A, Chen J W. Implications of Parental
Divorce For Female Development. 24 Journal of The American Academy
of Child Psychiatry (1985) pp 538-544
# Among adolescent girls there is a strong correlation between
family structure and alcohol abuse
Frost A K, Pakiz B. The Effects of Marital Disruption On Adolescents:
Time As A Dynamic. 60(4) American Journal of Orthopsychiatry (1990)
pp 544-555.
# The divorce rate predicted the rate of robbery in any given area,
regardless of the economic and the racial composition, based on a
study of 171 American cities with populations over 100,000. In these
communities, he found that the lower the rates of divorce the less
the crime.
Sampson R J. Crime In Cities: The Effects of Formal and Informal
Social Control. In M Tonry, N Morris (editors), Crime and Justice.
University of Chicago Press, Chicago, IL, (1995) pp 271-301
# Other American data indicates that 43 percent of prison inmates
grew up in a single–parent household and an additional 14 percent
lived in households without either biological parent. Another 14 percent
had spent at last part of their childhood in a foster home, agency
or other juvenile institution. (adding this up, 70% of inmates didn’t
have both natural parents, ed.)
US Bureau of Justice Statistics. Survey of State Prison Inmates.
US Bureau of Justice, Washington D C (1991)
# Sixty percent of rapists and seventy-two percent of adolescent
murderers in America grew up in homes without fathers.
Davidson N. Life Without Father. (1990)
# The one factor that most closely correlates with crime is the
absence of the father in the family. Controlling for family configuration
erases the relationship between race and crime and between low income
and crime. This conclusion shows up time and again in the literature.
Kamarck E, Galston W. Putting Children First. Progressive Policy
Institute (1990)
# According to the Western Australian Child Health Survey, children
in single parent and step/blended households have up to two times
greater incidence of mental health problems than children in intact
families (two natural parents).
Silburn et.al. Western Australian Child Health Survey: Family and
Community Health. Australian Bureau of Statistics and the TVW Telethon
Institute For Child Health Research. Perth, W.A. (1996)
# One U.S. study tracked one thousand families with children aged
six to eighteen for six years and found that those children living
in intact married families exhibited the least delinquency, while
children with stepfathers had the greatest risk of the most disruptive
behaviour. In this study single-parent children fell in between.
Rickel A U, Langer T S. Short-Term and Long-Term Effects of Marital
Disruption On Children. 13 American Journal of Community Psychology
(1985) pp 599-661
# 15 times higher prevalence of depression in 12 to 14 years olds
not living with both of their natural parents.
Garrison et.al. Incidence of Major Depressive Disorder an Dysthymia
In Young Adolescents. 36 Journal of American Academy of Children and
Adolescent Psychiatry (1997) pp 458-465.
# At every income level except the very highest (over US$50,000
a year), children living with never-married mothers were more likely
than their counterparts in two-parent families to have been expelled
or suspended from school, to display emotional problems, and to engage
in antisocial behaviour.
National Health Interview Survey. United States Department of Health
and Human Services, Hyattsille, MD (1988) cited in Wilson J Q. In
Loco Parentis: Helping Children When Families Fail Them The Brookings
Review (Fall 1993)
# Higher divorce rates in a society lead to higher suicide rates
among children. Prior to the divorce revolution of the 1970s unemployment
was the biggest correlate with suicide, but that has changed (McCall
et al). The largest demographic indicator of suicide is the family
structure within which the person resides, and that the divorced family
structure is most dangerous. This link between the rise in adolescent
suicide in the past three decades with parental divorce has been found
again and again in the literature, and in cross-cultural studies of
Japan and the United States. For children the suicide is often triggered
by thoughts that their parents have rejected them or have lost interest
in them (Wodarski et al).
McCall P.L, Land K. C. Trends in White Maile Adolescent, Young-Adult,
and Elderly Suicide: Are There Common Underlying Structural Factors?
23 Social Science Research (1994) pp 57-81.
Nelson F.L. et al. Youth Suicide in California: A Comparitive Study
of Perceived Causes and Interventions. 24 Community Mental Health
(Spring 1988) pp 31-42
Noevi Velez C, Cohen P. Suicidal Behaviour and Ideation in a Community
Sample of Children: Maternal and Youth Reports 27(3) Journal of The
American Acadamy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry (1988) pp 349-356.
Larson D. B, Swyers J. P, Larson S. S. The Costly Consequences
of Divorce. National Institute for Healthcare Research. Rockville,
Maryland (1995) p. 124.
Wodarski J. S, Harris P. Adolescent Suicide: A Review of Influences
and the Means for Prevention. 32(6) Social Work (1987) pp 477-484.
# Some experts to recommend paternal residence as a preference
for boys and maternal residence for girls. However, such a legislative
mandate would be inappropriate at present for two reasons. First,
no child should ever be denied the right to know and love two care-giving
parents (except, obviously, in abuse situations). Second, no parent
should be denied his or her parental rights (i.e., human rights) without
conclusive evidence that the exercise of those rights is destructive
of the child). Thirdly, This can deny children from having a relationship
with their siblings.
Finally, this would fail to achieve the only justification of sole-residence
– which is to remove one parent from the children’s lives.
Rohman L W, Sales B D, Lou M. The Best Interests of The Child In
Custody Disputes. In L A Weithorn (Editor), Psychology and Child Custody
Determinations. University of Nebraska Press, Lincoln Nebraska, (1987)
Thompson R. The Fathers Case In Child Custody Decisions: The Contributions
of Psychological Research. In M E Lamb, A Sargi (Editors), Fatherhood
and Social Policy. Erlbaum, Hillsdale, New Jersey (1983). pp 50-100
Risks from Mummy's new boyfriend - 24 citations
The Family Court awards sole custody to the mother in the majority
of cases. These children have a high risk of living with “mummies-new-boyfriend”
in the future. These children face a vastly increased risk of being
abused or killed. Cinderella isn’t the only child abused by
a wicked step-parent.
Loving step-parents are to be admired and respected. However not
every sexual partner of a single parent becomes a loving step-parent.
An un-related adult entering a child’s home as simply as “mummies-new-boyfriend”
is an obvious risk to a child’s safety.
We have found 24 citations to published research showing a tremendous
increase in risk when children live with a step-parent or “mummy's-new-boyfriend”.
A child is at approximately twenty (20) times higher risk of being
abused when living with a step-parent than when the child is with
it’s natural (biological) parents.
Sadly, most studies about child abuse don’t separate “natural
fathers” from “step fathers”.
Since few children live with a step-parent, the risk when living
with a step-parent is much higher than the raw percentage of abuse
suggests.
Simply multiply by 20 to get the increased risk for a child living
with a step parent or mummies-new-boyfriend. Simply multiply by 7
to get the increased risk for a child living in a sole parent household.
For example if 30% of abuse occurs in stepfamilies, you multiply
30% x 20 = 6. Children in step families are at six times more likely
to be abused than if they were living with both their natural parents.
The calculations work like this.
81% of children live with both natural parents while 13.5% live
with a sole parent and only 4.2% live with a stepparent.
So..
% x 81% divided by 13.5% = 6 times the risk of living with both
natural parents
% x 81 divided by 4.2% = 20 times the risk of living with both natural
parents
# Children are at far greater risk of abuse from step-parents than
from natural parents. A birth cohort of over 1019 youngsters when
they were aged 18 year-olds found an overall prevalence rate of sexual abuse of children of 10.4%. Only 2 (1.5%) of those cases involved natural
parents as perpetrators but 22.5% of accused offenders were step-parents.
Daly, Martin, and Wilson, Margo (1987):
"Children as Homicide Victims", in: Gelles, Richard J. and
Jane B. Lancaster (eds.), Child Abuse and Neglect: Biosocial Dimensions,
1987, New York: Aldine de Gruyter.
Risks to children living with stepparents: statistics.
Daly, Martin, and Wilson, Margo (1988):
"Homicide". Hawthorne, NY: Aldine de Gruyter.
Similar content (pp 85-93) to Daly, Martin, and Wilson, Margo (1987).
Fergusson D, Lynskey MT, Horwood LJ (1996). Childhood sexual abuse
and psychiatric disorder in young adulthood: Prevalence of sexual
abuse and factors associated with sexual abuse. Journal of the American
Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, 34(10): 1355-1364.
# A number of other studies also have indicated that step-fathers
are far more likely to engage in serious sexual abuse with their step-daughters
than natural fathers. For example, Finkelhor found that “a step-father
was five times more likely to sexually victimise a daughter than was
a natural father”.
Finkelhor D (1980). Risk factors in the sexual victimization of
children, Child Abuse, Neglect, 7, 133-146. 106
Perlmutter LH, Engel T, Sager CJ (1982). The incest taboo: loosened
sexual boundaries in remarried families, Journal of Sex, Marital Therapy,
8 (2):83-96.
Russell D (1983). ’The incidence and prevalence of intrafamilial
sexual abuse of female children’, Child Abuse and Neglect, 7
(2), 133-76.
# A study of all state child protective services agencies by the
Children's Rights Coalition (a child advocacy and research organisation
in Austin Texas), found that biological mothers physically abuse their
children at twice the rate of biological fathers. The majority of
the rest of the time, children were abused because of the single-mothers'
poor choices in the subsequent men in their lives. Incidences of abuse
were almost non-existent in single-father-headed households (Anderson
1990).
Department of Human Services (1987-1988). Texas Children’s
Rights Coalition, Austin Texas (1990)
# National data collected by the Australian Institute of Health
and Welfare (AIHW) show child abuse and neglect statistics have an
over-representation of single-parent households. More cases involved
children from female single-parent households (39%) than families
with two natural parents (30%) or other two parent households such
as step parent households (21%).
Since only 13% of children live in female single parent households
(Australian Bureau of Statistics 1995) and 34% of sexual abuse of children
occurs in this type of household––it follows that the
relative risk of sexual abuse of children in a female single parent household
is over seven times the risk in a two natural parent family (34/13
x 81/30). The relative risk of any kind of abuse in a single parent
household is eight times that of a two natural parent family.
The situation is becoming more serious. The Australian Bureau of
Statistics reports that between 1982 and1992, the number of families
headed by a lone parent grew by more than 180,000, reaching an estimated
619,000––an increase of 42% in just ten years (ABS 1995).
Angus G, Hall G (1996). Child Abuse and Neglect Australia 1994-1995.
Canberra: Australian Institute of Health and Welfare. (Australian
Institute of Health and Welfare Series; no 16)
Australian Bureau of Statistics. Australian Social Trends 1995.
Australian Bureau of Statistics, catalogue number 4102.0, Australian
Publishing Service, Canberra (1995). Further, the Australian Bureau
of Statistics reports that in 1992 approximately 81% of children under
the age of fifteen resided with both natural parents, 4% resided in
step-families (one natural parent and a married or defacto partner),
3% were in joint custody and less than 1% resided in some other type
of household (e.g. with extended family members).
# Higher levels of divorce mean higher levels of child abuse. Remarriage
does not reduce this level of child abuse and may even add to it.
Serious abuse is much higher among stepchildren compared with children
of intact families.
Fergusson D M, Lynskey M T, Horwood L J. Childhood Sexual Abuse
and Psychiatric disorders In Young Adulthood: Prevalence of Sexual
Abuse and Factors Associated With Sexual Abuse. 34 Journal of The
American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry (1996) pp 1355-1364
# The rate of sexual abuse of girls by stepfathers is estimated
to be from six to seven times more likely by Russell, and much as
40 times more when compared with such abuse by biological fathers
in intact families.
Russell D E H. The Prevalence and Seriousness of Incestuous Abuse:
Stepfathers vs. Biological Fathers. 8Child Abuse and Neglect (1984)
pp.15-22
Wilson M, Daly M. The Risk of Maltreatment of Children Living with
Stepparents. In R J Gelles, J B Lancaster (Editors), Child Abuse and
Neglect: Biosocial Dimensions, Foundations of Human Behaviour. Aldine
de Gruyter, New York (1987) pp 215-232
# Australian Human Rights Commissioner Brian Burdekan reported
that sexual abuse of girls is around 17 times higher in households
where the adult male is not the natural father than in a two natural
parent family. In a stepfamily, the abuser may be an older stepsibling
– not necessarily the stepparent.
Burdekan B. Our Homeless Children. Report of The National Inquiry
Into Homeless Children By The Human Rights and Equal Opportunity Commission.
Australian Government Publishing Service, Canberra (1989)
# Children two years and younger are seventy to a hundred times
more likely to be killed at the hands of stepparents than at the hands
of biological parents.
Wilson M, Daly M. The Risk of Maltreatment of Children Living with
Stepparents. In R J Gelles, J B Lancaster (Editors), Child Abuse and
Neglect: Biosocial Dimensions, Foundations of Human Behaviour. Aldine
de Gruyter, New York (1987) pp 215-232
# Fatal abuse of children of all ages occurs three times more frequently
in stepfamilies than in intact married families. Neglect of children,
which frequently is more psychologically damaging than physical abuse
is also twice as high among separated and divorced parents. Emery
R. Abused and Neglected Children. 44(2) The American Psychologist
(1989) pp 321-328
# Female offenders usually being the child’s biological mother
and male offenders usually a de-facto or a step-parent.
Alder, Pol (2001) Child victims of homicide. Cambridge: Cambridge
University Press.
# When (AIC) research analyst Jenny Mouzos crunched figures on
the distribution of parents who killed children by gender and biological
ties, she found biological mothers posed a more lethal risk to their
own. Biological mothers account for about 35 per cent of all filicides
(about the same proportion as stepfathers and de factos), while biological
fathers account for 29 per cent."
Jenny Mouzos, Homicidal encounters : a study of homicide in Australia
1989-1999. ISBN 0 642 24165 1 ; ISSN 1326-6004 Canberra: Australian
Institute of Criminology, 2000
# De-facto or step-parents are more likely to kill children in their
care than biological parents, and step-fathers are more likely to
kill a child than a step-mother. This is in part due to small children
rarely residing with a biological father and step-mother. The most
common offender is a young male living in a de-facto relationship
with the child’s mother.
Strang (1995) “Child abuse homicides in Australia: Incidence,
circumstances, prevention and control.” In D. Chappell and S.
Egger (Eds.) Australian Violence: Contemporary Perspectives II (pp.
71-86), Canberra: Australian Institute of Criminology.
Daly, Wilson (1994) Some differential attributes of lethal assaults
on small children by stepfathers versus genetic fathers. In Ethology
and Sociobiology, 15 (pp. 207-217)
# Step-fathers and de-facto fathers are disproportionately represented
as sex offenders. Girls living with stepfathers are seven times more
likely to be sexually abused by a step-father or by their mother’s
de-facto partner than girls living with their biological father.
Russell (1989) The secret trauma: Incest in the lives of girls
and women. New York, Basic Books.
# If kids stay with their mother after divorce, they often end
up living with a step-father, or "mummy’s new boyfriend".
Recent research suggests that the most dangerous place for a child
could be with its mother and her new man.
Of 58 children killed by a family member, 22 were killed by their
mother and a further 27 by a step-father. Only nine of the victims
were killed by their real father (16%).
Jenny Morgan, Who Kills Whom and Why: Looking beyond Legal Categories
University of Melbourne. Published by the Victorian Law Reform Commission,
2002
# However, a startling 84% were killed either by the mother or
her new boyfriend/stepfather. In fact, mothers were as likely to kill
their own children as (real) fathers and step-fathers combined.
Polk, K. and Adler, C., “Child Victims of homicide”
(2001). Cited in “Who kills whom and why.” Morgan, j.,
Victorian Law Reform Commission 2002.
# “There are more children growing up without their biological
fathers. Biological fathers, by and large, do not sexually abuse their
children - 2 per cent compared with 10 per cent of stepfathers or
de-factos."
Professor of forensic psychiatry at Monash University, Professor
Paul Mullen, cited in "Betraying the trust of children",
Author: Sally Heath, Date: 26/04/1996, Words: 1550, Publication: The
Age, Section: News, Page: 17)
# Stepparents always have had a difficult time establishing close
bonds with new stepchildren as even traditional fairy tales recount.
Sole residence is the judicial preferment of stepparents. Difficulties
between children and stepparents are not confined to Grimm’s
fairy tales. The fairytale theme is confirmed in the research literature:
The rate of bonding between stepparents and stepchildren is rather
low. By one study only 53 percent of stepfathers and 25 percent of
stepmothers may have parental feelings toward their stepchildren,
and still fewer to love them. A Melbourne study (Hodges 1982), indicated
considerable difficulties were experienced by adolescents on the re-marriage
of the resident parent (usually the mother). The majority appeared
uncomfortable. Parents favour their own children. Bi-parental care
is universal in our species and is a fundamental attribute (Dally,
Wilson 1980).
Hodges E. Adolescents’ Post-Divorce Relationships With Parents
and Step-Parents: A Melbourne Study, from Willcott I. Parenting After
Separation (1982) p 16.
See also:
Greif J B, Simuring S K. Remarriage and Joint Custody. 20 Conciliation
Courts Review (1982) at 9
Daly M, Wilson M. Discriminate Parental Solicitude: A Biological
Perspective. 42 Journal of Marriage and The Family (1980) p 277
Premature puberty – 13 citations
Recent corroborated research show that girls without their natural
(biological) fathers reach puberty 9 months earlier than girls who
live with their natural fathers and are several times more likely
to become pregnant as teenagers, even after controlling for wealth
and race.
There are many things we do not yet know about our bodies. Some
researchers argue that this is a result of the trauma of separation;
others view it as a biological fact, possibly due to some hormonal
mechanism.
A child’s natural father seems to protect a child from premature
puberty and promiscuity. We have found 13 citations showing that girls
reach puberty earlier and are more likely to become teenage mothers
if they don’t have shared residence with their natural fathers.
# There seems to be a protective effect increasing health and reducing
promiscuity when children live with their natural (genetic) fathers.
Rates of teenage pregnancy increased from about 1:20 among father-present
girls to 1:3 among early father-absent girls in the US sample, and
from about 1:30 among father-present girls to 1:4 among early father-absent
girls in the New Zealand sample (early father absence was defined
as the first five years of life)."
"... teenage girls are more likely to go through puberty early
up to nine months earlier than in some cases when they live with unrelated
males (like stepfathers), another factor which increases risk of early
sexual behaviour." (please note that these few months brings
the onset of puberty generally in primary school. Dr Bruce Ellis of
the University of Canterbury, NZ quoted in "A rainbow ends for
Daddy's little girl" Author: Bettina Arndt Date: 23/09/2003 Words:
1678, Publication: Sydney Morning Herald, Section: News And Features,
Page: 11)
# If a mother's new partner becomes part of the family, this can
increase the risk for these girls. A few years ago, QUT's Nicholson
was involved in research with Professor David Fergusson, another of
the Christchurch team, which found that teenagers in step-families
are 50 per cent more likely to engage in early sexual activity and
have multiple partners.
“A rainbow ends for Daddy's little girl”, Bettina Arndt
Sydney Morning Herald, 23/09/2003. Page: 11
# Many studies have identified the absence of the natural (biological)
father from the home as a major risk factor for early sexual activity.
Day, R.D. (1992). The transition to first intercourse among racially
and culturally diverse youth, Journal of Marriage and the Family,
54, 749-762.
Kiernan, K. E., Hobcraft, J. (1997). Parental divorce during childhood:
Age at first intercourse, partnership and parenthood. Population studies,
51, 41-55.
Newcomber, S., Udry, J.R. (1987). Parental marital status effects
on adolescent sexual behavior. Journal of Marriage and the Family,
49, 235-240.
# Many studies have also identified the absence of the natural
(biological) father from the home as a major risk factor for teenage
pregnancy.
Geronimus, A.T., Korenman, S. (1992). The socioeconomic consequences
of teen childbearing reconsidered. Quarterly Journal of Economics,
107, 1187-1214.
Hogan, D.P., Kitagawa, E.M. (1985). The impact of social status,
family structure, and neighborhood on the fertility of black adolescents.
American Journal of Sociology, 90, 825-855.
McLanahan, S.S. (1999). Father absence and the welfare of children.
In E.M. Hetherington (Ed.), Coping with divorce, single parenting,
and remarriage. Mahwah, NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum.
Belsky, J., Steinberg, L., Draper, P. (1991). Childhood experience,
interpersonal development, and reproductive strategy: An evolutionary
theory of socialization. Child Development, 62, 647-670.
Chisholm, J. S. (1999). Death, hope and sex: Steps to an evolutionary
ecology of mind. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.
Robbins, C., Kaplan, H. B., Martin, S. S. (1985). Antecedents of
pregnancy among unmarried adolescents. Journal of Marriage and the
Family, 47, 567-583.
Silverstein, L.B., Auerbach, C.F. (1999). Deconstructing the essential
father. American Psychologist, 54, 397-407.
# Children whose natural father was not present in their lives
from when they were younger than 5 years old, had a much higher risk
of adolescent pregnancy rates were approximately 7 times higher in
the US study and 8 times higher in the NZ study compared to families
that still had their natural (biological) father.
The study found that even after controlling factors such as wealth,
education and race, girls who lost their natural fathers when they
were younger than 5 years old still had between 3 and 5 times the
risk of having a teenage pregnancy. These other factors controlled
for included the age and education of the mother, the occupation of
the father, wealth, race, family conflict, stress and mothering style.
These studies suggest that there is some biological or hormonal
mechanism that results in early puberty and risk of teenage pregnancy.
Girls who lost their fathers when they were young didn’t have
significantly higher rates of behaviour problems, poor school results
or violence, after controlling for race, class etc as before.
Does father absence place daughters at special risk for early sexual
activity and teenage pregnancy?
Ellis, Bruce J., Child Development; Vol. 74, no. 3 May / Jun. 2003
Emotional and theoretical research
Less convincing than ‘quantitative’ research, this
research relies on questioning or observing subjects and interpreting
the results. Sometimes these studies rely on a theoretic framework,
such as Attachment Theory for this interpretation.
Meaningful relationships need shared residency – 40 citations
We have found 40 citations to published research showing that with
sole residency (or when the majority of time is with one parent),
the relationship with the other parent frequently withers and dies,
to the detriment of this parent and the children.
Understandably few studies attempt to show that 50-50 shared residence
is better than 49-51 or any other ratio. Many researchers use the
concept of a “Meaningful Relationship” with both parents.
Others measure the problems of living with a step-parent, or the absence
of the natural father. All of these approaches essentially mean the
same thing, i.e. they support shared residence.
Sadly the relationship with the other parent is often destroyed
by the parent with majority residence as a side effect of spite or
because the resident parent sees little value in the children having
a relationship with the person she rejected.
Other times the relationship simply withers due to the artificial
nature of being a ‘Disney dad”.
# The most serious impediment to a father continuing to parent his
children after separation is the Family Court.
Goodyear-Smith, Felicity (1993). First Do No Harm: the sexual abuse
industry, Benton-Guy Publishers, Auckland
# Other research has also shown that fathers were much more involved
with their children in joint residence situations than in maternal
residence
Greif J B. Fathers, Children and Joint Custody. 49 American Journal
of Orthopsychiatry (1979). pp 311-319 at 314
Luepnitz D A. Child Custody: A Study of Families After Divorce.
Lexington Books, Massachusetts (1982)
Luepnitz D A. A Comparison of Maternal, Paternal, and Joint Custody:
Understanding The Varieties of Post-Divorce Family Life. 9 Journal
of Divorce (1986) pp 1-12
Kelly J B. Longer-Term Adjustment In Children of Divorce: Converging
Findings and Implications For Practice. 2 Journal of Family Psychology
(1988a) pp 119-140
Shiller V M. Joint Verses Maternal Custody For Families With Latency
Age Boys: Parent Characteristics and Child Development. 56(3) American
Journal of Orthopsychiatry (1986a) pp 486-489
# That the best and perhaps only way to achieve true continuity
of family relationships is through the medium of joint residence which
aims to preserve the child's perception of both mother and father
as an integral part of his or her life, a positive role model, and
a continuing and consistent source of love, security, respect, discipline,
and exposure to a varied range of life experiences
Roman M, Haddad W. The Disposable Parent: The Case For Joint Custody.
Holt, Rinehart, Winston, New York (1978)
Coller D R. Joint Custody; Research, Theory and Policy. 27(4) Family
Process (December 1988) pp 259–269
Farrell W. Father and Child Reunion: How To Bring The Dads We Need
To The Children We Love. Tarsher/Putman, New York (January 2001)
# A second potential for abuse is contact denial, because parental
loss injures the child in terms of post-divorce adjustment, contact
denial may be viewed as one form of emotional abuse in a large percentage
of sole residence households.
Fulton J A. Parental Reports of Children’s Post-Divorce Adjustment.
35 Journal of Social Issues (1979) pp 126-139. See also, supra text
pp 73-74
Lovorn R. Why Women Join Fathers Rights Groups. Athens Banner Herald.
Athens Georgia (Thursday, 3 October 1991)
Gibson J. Non-Custodial Fathers and Access Patterns: Family Court
of Australia. Office of The Chief Executive. Summary of Key Findings.
Research report No. 10. Australian Government Publishing. Service
Canberra (1992).
McMurray A, Blackmore A M. Influences On Parent-Child Relationships
On Non-Custodial Fathers. 14(3) Australian Journal of Marriage and
Family (1992) pp 151-159 at p153
Wallerstein J S, Kelly J B. Surviving The Breakup: How Children
and Parents Cope With Divorce. Basic Books, New York (1980)
# Non-custodial parents continued meaningful relationship with
his children, especially with younger children, will be subject to
mother’s approval and permission. Sadly, too few resident mothers,
dealing with feelings of vulnerability, anger, and guilt, are willing
freely to grant such permission. This autonomy (power) over their
children’s contact with the father, often is in tandem with
revenge for real or perceived misdeeds.
Teyber E, Hoffman C. Missing Fathers. Psychology Today (April 1987)
pp 36-39
# “There is not only the most solid evidence of being loved
by both parents, but the chance to express rather than bury, whatever
angers and conflicts the divorce engenders. This chance is absent
in the sole custody household. Children are not only deeply pained
by one parent’s absence, but they interpret it as abandonment;
as a consequence, they feel devalued and guilty, yet they find they
have few ways to express their anger and confusion.”
Findings from research projects in Virginia, California, Arizona
and Texas support the position that in most cases, children benefit
from post-divorce arrangements that foster continuing relationships
with both parents and more contact with non-resident fathers than
was typically taking place.
Roman, Haddad (1978), cited in Kalter, N. Long Term Effects of Divorce
on Children: A Developmental Vulnerability Model. 57 American Journal
of Orthopsychiatry (1987)
Hetherington E M, Cox M, Cox R. Effects of Divorce On Parents and
Children. In M E Lamb (Editor), Non Traditional Families: Parenting
and Child Relationships. Lawerence Erlbaum, Hillsdale New Jersey (1982)
pp 223-288
Hetherington E. M., Hagan M. S. Divorced Fathers, Stress, Coping,
and Adjustment. In M. E. Lamb (Ed), The Father’s Role: Applied
Perspectives. John Wiley, New York (1986) pp 103-104
Wallerstein J S, Kelly J B. Surviving The Breakup: How Children
and Parents Cope With Divorce. Basic Books, New York (1980)
Braver S. L., O’Connell D. Divorced Dads: Shattering The
Myths. Tarcher/Putnan, New York (1998)
Warshak R. A. The Custody Revolution: The Father Factor and The
Motherhood Mystique. Simon, Schuster, New York (1992)
# A growing number of non-custodial parents (mainly fathers) are
unable to maintain contact with their children after separation. A
recent NZ survey found that 18% of custodial parents (mostly mothers)
and 15% of non-custodial parents (usually fathers) reported that the
non-custodial parent had no contact with their children six months
after the couple had separated.
Lee A (1990). A survey of parents who have obtained a dissolution,
Family Court Custody, Access Research, 2, p 63.
# Large numbers of post separation children are denied their Court
ordered (and deserved) contact to their non–resident fathers
on many occasions, often with cold and calculating regularity. The
reasons are often frivolous and ridiculous and are usually mis-stated.
Fulton J A. Parental Reports of Children’s Post-Divorce Adjustment.
35 Journal of Social Issues (1979) pp 126-13
Wallerstein J S, Kelly J B. Surviving The Breakup: How Children
and Parents Cope With Divorce. Basic Books, New York (1980)
Jacobs J W. Treatment of Divorcing Fathers: Social and Psychotherapeutic
Considerations, 140 American Journal of Psychiatry (1983) 1294-1299
Koch M A P, Lowery C R. Visitation and The Non-Custodial Father.
8 Journal of Divorce (1984) pp 47-65
Kelly J B. Longer-Term Adjustment In Children of Divorce: Converging
Findings and Implications For Practice. 2 Journal of Family Psychology
(1988a) pp 119-140
# Other research by the Family Court shows that within a few years
of the divorce, less than a quarter of fathers still have contact
with their children, and more than half have contact only twice a
year or not at all. Most non-resident fathers wanted to see their
children more often, but almost half of the fathers reported that
their former wives frequently opposed contact and employed strategies
to reduce it. Overall the men presented a bleak view of the role of
the non-resident father. Many feel it painful and unrewarding. It
is totally devastating said one. The child cannot understand how I
am forced to see so little of him its breaking my heart said another.
Gibson J. Non-Custodial Fathers and Access Patterns: Family Court
of Australia. Office of The Chief Executive. Summary of Key Findings.
Research report No. 10. Australian Government Publishing. Service
Canberra (1992).
# The fall off in contact does not lie in background variables like
economic factors, parental involvement prior to the break-up or the
age of the child, but in the structure of contact ordered by court.
The marginalisation and disengagement of fathers is an inevitable
consequence of the sole residence.
Loewan J. Visitation Fatherhood. In P Bronstein, C Pape Cowan (Editors),
Fatherhood Today. John Wiley (1988) at pp195-213
# Fathers who had a close pre-separation relationship with their
children are more likely to become disengaged because of the artificiality
and limitations of contact parenting.
Kruk E. Psychological and Structural Factors Contributing To The
Disengagement of Non Custodial Fathers After Divorce. 30(1) Family
and Conciliation Courts Review (January 1992 ) pp 81-101
# Often the non-resident father reacts to a sole residence award
as if they have lost their child, and soon a meaningful relationship
also dies and they become a holiday parent or Disneyland Dad bringing
gifts. Contact becomes a frantic effort to entertain and court the
child in order to retain the child’s affection. This pseudo-relationship
is not an adequate substitute for a meaningful relationship. It’s
artificial structure lacks normal activities: putting a child to sleep,
helping with homework, preparing a meal together etc.
Greif J B. Fathers, Children and Joint Custody. 49 American Journal
of Orthopsychiatry (1979). pp 311-319 at 314
# “Fathers could not endure the pain of seeing their children
only intermittently, and by two years after the divorce coped with
this stress by seeing their children infrequently, although they continued
to experience a great sense of loss and depression.
Hetherington E M, Cox M, Cox R. Effects of Divorce On Parents and
Children. In M E Lamb (Editor), Non Traditional Families: Parenting
and Child Relationships. Lawerence Erlbaum, Hillsdale New Jersey (1982)
pp 223-288
# “The father's anxieties centre around having lost his children,
so he courts them. But after a while the frantic drive to maintain
contact with his children during a hurried meal, a visit to the zoo,
the park and other entertainment places is too painful. He feels as
if his son or daughter has become his guest, someone he amuses for
a few hours. He has lost meaningful, that is to say non-holiday, contact
with his children and, in time, often withdraws. He protects himself
by moving away from his children since the situation, as it exists,
is emotionally too difficult for him and he can see no way to change
it”
“As things now stand it is very difficult – financially,
socially, and emotionally for men and women to do anything but conform
to the irrational bias in favour of sole custody. Under joint custody
on the other hand, both parents are equal."
Roman M, Haddad W. The Disposable Parent: The Case For Joint Custody.
Holt, Reinhart, Winston, New York (1978) at 178.
# “Central to this younger group of children was the very
strong sense of loss with regard to the departed father...Many felt
abandoned and rejected, and expressed their longing in ways reminiscent
of grief for a dead parent...The intensity of the response in this
age group was striking...The degree of closeness and gratification
in the pre-divorce father-child relationship, at least from our perspective
was not a factor in determining this acute reaction.”
Wallerstein J S, Kelly J B. Surviving The Breakup: How Children
and Parents Cope With Divorce. Basic Books, New York (1980)
# Mitigating the parental sense of loss has legal and practical
ramifications. In reaction to depression caused by the loss of one’s
child, a parent may result to renewal of litigation - a potentially
devastating course for both parent and child.
Wallerstein J S, Kelly J B. Surviving The Breakup: How Children
and Parents Cope With Divorce. Basic Books, New York (1980)
# “For fathers with more than one child, a limited visitation
period severely restricts the opportunity for much needed time alone
with each child.... Yet repeatedly, they talked of missing the intimacy
of time alone...”
Greif G L, Pabst M S. Mothers Without Custody (1988) at 147-149
# The central and most compelling argument in favour of joint residence
is that it helps children and fathers maintain their relationship.
This is a powerful argument because a number of studies have documented
that a father's continued involvement with his child is associated
with a positive outcome for the child
Hetherington E M, Cox M, Cox R. Play and Social Interaction. In
Children Following Divorce. Paper presented at the National Institute
of Mental Health Conference On Divorce. Washington D C (February 1978)
Hess R D, Camera KA. Post Divorce Relationships As Mediating Factors
In The Consequences and Children. 35(4) Journal of Social Issues (1979)
pp 79-96
Wallerstein J S, Kelly J B. Surviving The Breakup: How Children
and Parents Cope With Divorce. Basic Books, New York (1980)
Kurdeck L A, Berg B. Correlates of Children's Adjustment In Their
Parent's Divorce. In L A. Kurdeck (Editor), Children and Divorce.
Jossey-Bass, San Francisco (1983) pp 47-60
Shared residence reduces conflict – 9 citations
Joint residence reduces conflict between the parents and consequently
improves the lives of the children and their parents. Joint residence
also means that the family’s assets are more equally divided
and this is often the un-stated motivation of advocates objecting
to reforms.
We have found 8 citations to published research showing that joint
residence reduces conflict between separated parents
# Joint residence arrangements show reduced conflict because joint
residence appears to more fully satisfy the needs of both parents
It provides a combination of time off for one parent and enhanced
involvement in child rearing for the other
Ilfeld F, Ilfeld H, Alexander J. Does Joint Custody Work? A First
Look At Outcome Data of Relitigation. 138 American Journal of Psychiatry
(1982) pp 62-68
Luepnitz D A. Child Custody: A Study of Families After Divorce.
Lexington Books, Massachusetts (1982)
Roman M, Haddad W. The Disposable Parent: The Case For Joint Custody.
Holt, Rinehart, Winston, New York (1978)
# The advantages of joint residence leads to less litigation in
the Family Court
Luepnitz D A. (1982). Child Custody: A Study of Families After Divorce.
Lexington Books, Massachusetts
Bauserman R. (2002) Child Adjustment In Joint Custody Verses Sole-Custody
Arrangements: A Meta-Analytic Review. 16(1) Journal Of Family Psychology
# Dramatically higher compliance with child support orders.
Montana Child Support Advisory Council (1986). Custody And Visitation:
A Report To The State Child Support Commission
# Fathers in joint custody comply with their child support obligations
in 90.2% of cases; fathers with contact comply 79.1% of the time and
fathers with no contact privileges comply only 44.5% of the time.
Lester G. H (September 1991) Child Support And Alimony (1989) A
Report Of The U.S. Bureau Of The Department Of Commerce, Bureau Of
The Census, Current Population Reports, Consumer-Income P-60 No 173.
U.S. Government Printing Office, Washington D.C.
# Studies constantly report parental satisfaction, even from parents
who initially had reservations about joint residence.
Luepnitz D A. Child Custody: A Study of Families After Divorce.
Lexington Books, Massachusetts (1982)
Sharply C F, Webber R F. Co-Parenting: An Alternative To Consider
In Separation Counselling. 10(3) Australian Journal of Sex, Marriage
and Family (1992) pp 111-117
Emotional security and attachment – 15 citations
The following research examines the subjective and emotional aspects
of divorce and the differences between sole parenting and shared residence.
We have found 9 citations to published research examining how sole
residence is emotionally damaging for children.
# A sole residence order is that the law is seen to be designating
one psychological parent for the child. This interpretation can prove
to be emotionally devastating for both parent and child.
Wallerstein J S, Kelly J B. Surviving The Breakup: How Children
and Parents Cope With Divorce. Basic Books, New York (1980)
# Most experts agree that children, especially very young ones,
need consistency and routine. Unfortunately, too many of these people,
relying on outmoded sexist stereotypes about men and women, believe
that infants and toddlers should live with the primary parent (the
mother) and that the father should be allowed to visit only two or
three hours every weekend with no overnights. This kind of schedule
however, is absolutely inappropriate for infant contact.
Fay R. Joint Custody In Infants and Toddlers: Theoretical and Practical
Aspects (1995)
# Loyalty conflicts, attachment and separation anxiety have also
been found to be associated with sole residence arrangements. Some
researchers believe that the psychological process underlying post-divorce
symptoms in children resemble mourning or bereavement. Even those
authors, who do not ascribe to the mourning theory, note that loss,
or severe attenuation of the parent-child bond is a real possibility
among children and non-resident parents.
Wallerstein, Kelly. The Effects of Parental Divorce: Experience
of The Child In Early Latency. 46(1) American Journal of Orthopsychiatry
(1976)
Weiss R. S. The Emotional Impact of Marital Separation. 32 Journal
of Social Issues (1976) pp 135-146.
Hetherington E, Cox M, Cox R. The Aftermath of Divorce. In Steven
and Mathews (Editors), Mother-Child, Father-Child Relations. Washington,
D.C.: National Association for the Education of Young Children (1978).
# Another study found that limited contact by the non-resident
parent severely restricts the opportunity to provide the daily nurturing
needed to strengthen the parent-child relationship. Often non-resident
parents, reacting to the pain of being forced to see their children
only intermittently cope by seeing them infrequently.
Greif J. B. Fathers, Children and Joint Custody. 49 American Journal
of Orthopsychiatry (1979). pp 311-319 at 314:
Hetherington E M, Cox M, Cox R. Effects of Divorce On Parents and
Children. In M E Lamb (Editor), Non Traditional Families: Parenting
and Child Relationships. Lawerence Erlbaum, Hillsdale New Jersey (1982)
pp 223-288:
# Not only do parents divorce each other, a divorce or mini divorce
happens between them and their children. Unlike the experience of
their parents, the child’s suffering does not reach its peak
at the divorce and then level off. Rather, the effect of the parents’
divorce can be played and replayed throughout the next three decades
of the children’s lives. These long-lasting effects are found
in country after country no matter what the socio-economic status
of the family. In 1998 the Australian House of Representatives Standing
Committee on Legal and Constitutional Affairs came to similar conclusions
in its report To Have and To Hold.
Kershet H F, Rosenthal K M. Single Parent Fathers: A New Study.
(May-June 1978) pp 13-14.
See also:
Kershet H F, Rosenthal K M. Father Presence: 4 Types of Post-Marital
Separation Fathering Arrangements. Paper presented at the N I M H
Symposium On Mental Health Consequences of Divorce On Children. Washington
DC (1978)
Wallerstein J. S, Blakeslee S. Second Chances: Men, Women and Children
a decade after Divorce. Houghton Mifflin Company, Boston (1989 –
reprinted 1996).
Commonwealth House of Representatives Standing Committee on Legal
and Constitutional Affairs. To Have And To Hold. Parliament of Australia,
Canberra (1998)
# Fathers are an important influence on their children’s development,
and a close relationship between father and child benefits the father
as well as the child. Children need their fathers, but fathers need
their children.
Parke R D. Fathers. Harvard University Press, Cambridge, Massachusetts
(1981)
# A longitudinal study of 131 children aged two through eighteen
found that preschoolers feared being abandoned after their parents
separation and that children of all ages expressed verbally and behaviourally
a great sense of loss if one parent was absent. Among the twenty-six
seven and eight year old children studied, the most pronounced reaction
to the parental divorce was the sense of loss suffered with regard
to the departed father. The study noted that the effects of being
left almost exclusively in the care of only one parent were negative.
In other research the authors recorded children's intense dissatisfaction
with the traditional two weekends contact per month, dictated by the
sole residence model, and their desire for more frequent contact with
their non-resident parents. Only the children who could see their
fathers several times a week were even moderately content.
Wallerstein J S, Kelly J B. Surviving The Breakup: How Children
and Parents Cope With Divorce. Basic Books, New York (1980):
The Effects of Parental Divorce: Experiences of The Pre-school Child.
14 Journal of Child Psychiatry (1975):
The Effects of Parental Divorce: Experience of The Child In Early
Latency. 46(1) American Journal of Orthopsychiatry (1976):
# “…young girls experience the loss of father egocentrically
as a rejection of them….the continued lack of involvement is
experienced as ongoing rejection by (the father). Many girls attribute
this rejection to their being not pretty enough, affectionate enough,
athletic enough, or smart enough to please father engage him in regular,
frequent contacts… The continuous sense of being valued and
loved as a female seems an especially key element in the development
of the conviction that one is indeed femininely lovable. Without this
regular source of nourishment, a girls sense of being valued as a
female does not seem to thrive”
Frost A K, Pakiz B. The Effects of Marital Disruption On Adolescents:
Time As A Dynamic. 60(4) American Journal of Orthopsychiatry (1990)
pp 544-555. Hereinafter as Marital Disruption
# These feelings of loss have also been reported in subsequent
British studies. Mitchell’s account of her interviews with 116
Scottish adolescents which were conducted five years after separation,
provides a moving record of the initial loneliness and bewilderness
of children that results from the inaccessibility of one parent following
separation (and sometimes in emotional terms, both). The remarriage
of one or the other parent constituted a second crisis for some of
the children in her sample because it dispelled the last vestiges
of hope (however unsubstantiated) that their parents might eventually
come back together again – often the precondition children believed
necessary for recovering two parents. They emphasised again and again
their need to be kept informed about what was happening. Mitchell
argued that doctors, lawyers, teachers, and social workers were important
attendants upon the process of marriage breakdown who therefore had
a primary mental health care role to play in the reconstruction of
family life after divorce. The case for educating professionals about
the known effects of divorce on children and their parents is well
made by Mitchell and other writers.
Lund M. Research On Divorce and Children. 14 Family Law (1984) pp
198-201.
See also, Walczack Y,. Burns S. Divorce: The Child's Point of View.
Harper, Row, London (1984)
Mitchell A. Children In The Middle: Living Through Divorce. Tavistok
Publications, London, New York (1985)
There is no evidence that sole custody is better for children –
2 citations
We have found 2 citations to published research where the researcher
explicitly says that they believe that there is no evidence that sole
parenting is best for children.
This is a difficult claim to make, it requires considerable knowledge
in the field because finding something that does exist is a lot easier
than proving something doesn’t exist.
# “…nor does their exist, any social science data to
support the proposition that a single official parent is preferable
to two.”
Roman M, Haddad W. The Disposable Parent: The Case For Joint Custody.
Holt, Rinehart, Winston, New York (1978)
# No study has found that joint residence is disadvantageous to
children. Where researchers have found significant differences, they
favour the joint residence arrangement. Only a few empirical studies
raise any concerns at all about joint residence and these have been
given an unwarranted anti joint residence spin. It is interesting
to note that even those researchers who currently oppose joint residence
do not argue that sole residence leads to a better adjustment of the
children (one can find little evidence for that proposition). The
strongest argument is merely that children in sole residence do not
do any worse than children in joint residence.
Kline M, Tschann J M, Johnston J R, Wallerstein J S. Children’s
Adjustment In Joint and Sole Physical Custody Families. 25 Developmental
Psychology (1989) pp 430-435
Attachment theory – 24 citations
Attachment theory is the basis of many family court rulings for
sole custody. The theory proposes that children need a secure emotional
attachment to caregivers for healthy emotional development. However
today attachment theory recognises that a child can form attachments
to several caregivers, typically the father and the mother.
Today, attachment theory DOES NOT suggest that there is only one
single attachment figure. Rather, babies can form multiple attachments,
particularly with the mother and the father. Although many professionals
and the family court use attachment theory to justify their belief
in the importance of a ‘primary’ caregiver.
Attachment theory itself is criticised because the first one of
it’s two core planks of the theory have not been reproduced
and better explanations exist. Attachment theory says firstly that
the style of care-giving the child receives determines the child’s
response in the ‘strange situation’ experiment. And secondly
that the ‘strange situation’ measurement of a child then
goes on to predict many outcomes for the child later in life, including
emotional adjustment, success at school, and many other measures of
well-being. This second plank has been widely confirmed.
The first plank however is based on a single experiment of 26 children,
the Baltimore project in 1963. This has not been reproduced. A more
convincing explanation for interpreting the ‘strange situation’
is that it is simply a form of personality test and not related to
care-giving style or attachment to the mother at all. Children are
born with different temperaments and this is the main factor in their
response to the attachment theory measurement of the strange situation.
Attachment theory was the life’s work of Bowlby and Ainsworth.
# Bowlby’s own research published just 5 years after the maternal
deprivation monograph concluded that the dangers of separation had
been overstated.
Bowlby J, Ainsworth M, Boston M, Rosenbluth D. The Effects of Mother-Child
Separation: A Follow-Up Study. 29 British Journal of Medical Psychology
(1956) p 211
# In his later work, Bowlby (1988) acknowledged the enduring attachments
bonds between father and child.
Bowlby J. A Secure Base. Basic Books, New York (1988)
# Children are born with different temperaments and this is the
main factor in their response to the attachment theory measurement
of the strange situation, rather than attachment to a caregiver or
that caregiver’s parenting style.
Kagan, Jerome (1989) Temperamental Contributions to Social Behavior
(1988 APA Award Address). American Psychologist, 44(4), 668-674
# Most children develop bonds with several people and it appears
likely that these bonds are basically similar. …...an infant
is not confined to just one bond...once he has reached the stage of
forming specific attachments, he is capable of maintaining a number
at the same time...
Grote D F, Weinstein P J. Joint Custody: A Viable and Ideal Alternative.
1 Journal of Divorce (Fall 1977). pp 43-53:
# Like many others Bowlby confuses biology and culture. His is
the mathematics of sexism, which manages to quantify and endorse two
mutually exclusive sex-defined roles for parents to act. And it is
more dangerous: herein a psychoanalyst gives credence to the view
of the father as a non-parent, a ‘useful’ financial and
emotional presence for his contented wife.
Roman M, Haddad W. The Disposable Parent: The Case For Joint Custody.
Holt, Rinehart, Winston, New York (1978)
# While maternal attachment has been widely recognised for several
decades, the more recent literature on attachment clearly demonstrates
that children form important bonds with both parents.
Thompson R. The Fathers Case In Child Custody Decisions: The Contributions
of Psychological Research. In M E Lamb, A Sargi (Editors), Fatherhood
and Social Policy. Erlbaum, Hillsdale, New Jersey (1983). pp 50-100
Rohman L W, Sales B D, Lou M. The Best Interests of The Child In
Custody Disputes. In L A Weithorn (Editor), Psychology and Child Custody
Determinations. University of Nebraska Press, Lincoln Nebraska, (1987)
# The attachment bond with the father is the beginning of the development
of social skills, and social relationships, and, in the broader context
of society cannot in any way be considered secondary to the mother-child
attachment.
Warshak R A. The Custody Revolution: The Father Factor and The Motherhood
Mystique. Simon, Schuster, New York (1992)
# Steinman evaluated 24 couples who chose joint residence arrangements
for their children at divorce. The children felt that they were strongly
attached to both parents and were not were not troubled by the loyalty
conflicts. A comparatively low rate of the children experiencing confusion
or anxiety to their shared residence arrangement. Consequently the
argument that children in joint residence experience more confusion
and frustration was not supported in that study.
Steinman S. The Experiences of Children In A Joint Custody Arrangement:
A Report of A Study. 51 American Journal of Orthopsychiatry (1981)
pp 403-414
# The notion that children have only one psychological parent has
been thoroughly discredited by a large body of evidence that has demonstrated
that infants normally develop close attachments to both of their parents.
Thompson R. The Fathers Case In Child Custody Decisions: The Contributions
of Psychological Research. In M E Lamb, A Sargi (Editors), Fatherhood
and Social Policy. Erlbaum, Hillsdale, New Jersey (1983). pp 50-100
Rohman L W, Sales B D, Lou M. The Best Interests of The Child In
Custody Disputes. In L A Weithorn (Editor), Psychology and Child Custody
Determinations. University of Nebraska Press, Lincoln Nebraska, (1987)
Biller H B. Fathers and Families: Paternal Factors In Child Development.
Auburn House, Westport, C T (1993). See also, Jackson B. Fatherhood.
Allen, Unwin, London (1984)
# Attachment occurs at about 6 months of age and that they do best
when they have the opportunity to establish and maintain such attachments.
Reducing the father’s involvement in the children’s lives
to a trivial level obviously destroys this major attachment.
Parke R. Fathers. Harvard University Press, Cambridge, Massachusetts
(1981)
Warshak R A. The Custody Revolution: The Father Factor and The
Motherhood Mystique. Simon, Schuster, New York (1992)
Lamb M E. The Role of The Father In Child Development. (M E Lamb,
Editor, 3rd edition). John Wiley, New York (1997)
# Attachment bonds which meet different needs of the developing
child are not interchangeable one type of attachment cannot typically
make up for the absence of the other.
Thompson R. The Fathers Case In Child Custody Decisions: The Contributions
of Psychological Research. In M E Lamb, A Sargi (Editors), Fatherhood
and Social Policy. Erlbaum, Hillsdale, New Jersey (1983). pp 50-100
# Most children in normal families experience a variety of caregivers,
even in their second and third year.
Hill M. Sharing Child Care In Early Parenthood. RKP (1987)
# Infants can he attached to a hierarchy of figures, including
fathers, grandparents, and siblings, as well as to day-care providers.
Schaffer, H, R., Emerson, P. F. (1964). The development of social
attachments in infancy. Monographs of the Society for Research in
Child Development, 29 (Serial No. 94).
Also:
Howes, C., Rodning, C., Galuzzo, D. C., Myers, 1. (1988). Attachment
and child care: Relationships with mother and caregiver. Early Childhood
Research Quarterly, 3, 403-416.
# Contemporary attachment theory has abandoned the notion of monotrophy––the
idea that children have a biological need to develop selective attachment
to just one person. The notion that children have only one psychological
parent has been thoroughly discredited by a large body of evidence
that has demonstrated that infants normally develop close attachments
to both of their parents
Inge Bretherton, The origins of Attachment Theory: John Bowlby and
Mary Ainthwortth. Developmental Psychology (1992), 28, 759-775.
# The recognition that children usually have more than one loving
relationship that provides emotional security has led to a greater
realisation of the importance of facilitating attachments and a corresponding
de–emphasis on the trauma of separations
Rutter M. Clinical Implications of Attachment Concepts. 36 Journal
of Child Psychology and Psychiatry (1995a). pp 549-571
# It is now generally accepted that the finding that children are
distressed when separated from a parent and left with a stranger is
not at all relevant to the situation where children are separated
from one parent to whom they are attached and spend time with another
parent to whom they are attached.
Inge Bretherton, The origins of Attachment Theory: John Bowlby and
Mary Ainthwortth. Developmental Psychology (1992), 28, 759-775.
# Lamb, a leading authority on attachment, summarised two decades
of research as demonstrating that the presence of one attachment figure
provides sufficient emotional security to allow a child to avoid separation
anxiety when separated from another attachment figure. He concluded
that extended separations, including overnights apart from either
parent, usually do not distress infants when they are with the other
parent.
Lamb M E. Brief For The Texas Supreme Court Committee On Child Visitation.
Austin, Texas (3 November 1994). See also, Lamb, supra note 113
# The evidence reveals that babies clearly can and do form more
than one attachment relationship. They can, for example, be attached
securely to mother, father, and regular caregiver.
Attachment 101 for Attorneys: Implications for Infant Placement
Decisions Eleanor Willemsen Santa Clara University Kristen Marcel
Professional School of Psychology, Fresno, California
Children are not safer from domestic violence with their mothers
Many of the defenders of awarding mothers majority custody, use
the issue of violence to justify their case.
We do not condone violence in any domestic situation. We also do
not believe that men or women are better or less violent and research
citations shows that mothers are as violent as fathers.
Denying a child a meaningful relationship with her father because
of violence between the parents is putting the best interest of the
mother above the best interest of the child.
Finally, the Family Court places too much weight on unsubstantiated
accusations of violence, fear of violence or violence that happened
only once. Again, this places the best interest of the accusing parent
above the best interest of the child.
Killing their own children
We have found 11 citations to published research showing that where
a parent (including step-parent) kills their child, the parent is
the biological mother in the majority of cases. There is remarkable
consistency that 55%-60% of perpetrators were mothers.
# Child homicide by perpetrator relationship, 2002
Perpetrator Status Percent of Victims
Mother Only 32.6 %
Father Only 16.6 %
Mother and Father 19.2 %
Mother and Other 9.1 %
Father and Other 1.4 %
Nonparental Perpetrator 15.9 %
Unknown or Missing 5.1 %
2002 US Children’s Bureau statistics http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/cb/publications/cm02/chapterthree.htm#
perps U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Child Maltreatment
2002. Administration for Children and Families, Administration on
Children, Youth and Families www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/cb/publications/cm02/index.htm
# Biological mothers posed a more lethal risk to their own. Biological
mothers account for about 35 per cent of all filicides (about the
same proportion as stepfathers and de factos), while biological fathers
account for only 29 per cent."
Jenny Mouzos, Homicidal encounters : a study of homicide in Australia
1989-1999 ISBN 0 642 24165 1 ; ISSN 1326-6004 Canberra: Australian
Institute of Criminology, 2000
# Most studies indicate that women kill their children at least
as frequently as men:
-
Resnick P (1969). Child murder by parents: a psychiatric review
of filicide, American Journal of Psychiatry, 126 (3), 73-82. 105
-
Marks M, Kumar R.(Oct 1996) Infanticide in Scotland, Medicine,
Science, the Law, 36 (4), 299-305.
-
Marks M, Kumar R (Oct 1993). Infanticide in England and Wales,
Medicine, Science , the Law, 33 (4): 329-39.
-
Greenland C (Jul 1986). Identification And Management of High
Risk Cases. Health Visitor 39, 205.
-
United States Department Of Justice Report (1994). Murder In Families.
United States Department Of Justice, Washington DC.
# A 1988 report on parent-child homicides in Canada between 1974
and 1983 found that 54 per cent of children under 17 who had been
murdered by a parent had been killed by their mothers. The U.S.
Statistical Abstract 1987 reported that, of the reported child-maltreatment
cases between 1980 and 1984, between 57 and 61.4 per cent had been
perpetrated by the mother, while a 1977 study found that 53.1 per
cent of perpetrators were female, 21 per cent male and 22.6 per
cent of cases involved both parents.
Daly, Wilson Parent-Offspring Homicides in Canada, 1974-1983.
In Science, vol. 242. pp. 519-524 (1988)
Nagi. Child Maltreatment in the United States. Columbia University
Press. New York. (1977)
Statistical Abstract of the United States 1987 (table 277)
# In July 1994 the Bureau of Justice Statistics of the U. S. Department
of Justice released a Special Report detailing the results of a survey
of family homicides in 33 urban U. S. counties. The report said: “In
murders of their offspring, women predominated, accounting for 55
per cent of killers.” U.S. Department of Justice
Women commit more domestic violence against children.
Of all forms of domestic violence, violence against children must
be given far more significance than violence between parents.
We have found 11 citations to published research showing that men
are no more likely to abuse their children than their mothers. In
six of the citations, mothers are shown to be more likely to abuse
their children than a father.
# A study of 582 college men found that up to 78 per cent of those
abused as children had been abused by females.
Fromuth, M., Burkhart, B. Childhood Sexual Victimization Among College
Men: Definitions and Methological Issues. Violence and Victim. 1987.
Volume 2. No 4. pp. 241-253.
# Biological mothers were the perpetrators of physical abuse in
39% of the substantiated cases and biological fathers in 40% of the
substantiated cases.
Report of The Institute For The Prevention Of Child Abuse (1994).
Ontario Incidence Study Of Reported Child Abuse And Neglect, pp
67, 82, 83, xii, cited in The silence of the screams: violence by
women in intimate relationships, compiled by CSAG (Child Support Action
Group Incorporated in South Australia), researched by Yuri Joakimidis,
1996.
# Australian Institute of Health and Welfare information on the
sex of perpetrators in substantiated child abuse cases was 968 men
and 1138 women. In 1997 by the Australian Institute of Health and
Welfare to no longer publish data indicating the sex of perpetrators
in substantiated child abuse cases must be reversed. Curiously, these
reasons did not preclude the publication of these data in 1996.
Broadbent A, Bentley R (1997). Child Abuse and Neglect Australia
1995-1996. Australian Institute of Health and Welfare Catalogue No
CWS 1. Canberra: Australian Institute of Health and Welfare (Child
Welfare Series No 17)
Angus G, Hall G (1996). Child Abuse and Neglect Australia 1994-1995.
Canberra: Australian Institute of Health and Welfare. (Australian
Institute of Health and Welfare Series; no 16)
# A 2005 report on domestic violence released by the NSW Bureau
of Crime Statistics and Research (BOCSAR) found that a surprising
number of the domestic violence incidents recorded by police involve
male victims. Where the victim is younger than 15 or older than 39,
male victims outnumber female victims (by more than two-to-one for
the younger age group).
# Kid Abuse
-
61% of all child abuse committed by mothers:
-
38% of all child abuse committed by fathers:
Child maltreatment : reports from the states to the National Center
on Child Abuse and Neglect. National Clearinghouse on Child Abuse,
Neglect Information (U.S.) 1995
# A U.S. national study found that 29 per cent of women and 22
per cent of men had experienced physical, sexual, or psychological
Intimate partner violence during their lifetime.
Coker AL, Davis KE, Arias I, Desai S, Sanderson M, Brandt HM,
et al. Physical and mental health effects of intimate partner violence
for men and women. American Journal of Preventive Medicine 2002;23(4):260–8.
# The British Lord Chancellor's guidance on domestic violence makes
a reference to evidence that most violence against children is perpetrated
by mothers.
Melanie Phillips “Man beaters behind closed doors” The
Sunday Times, London, November 19 2000
# Mothers (49% of incidents) are more likely than fathers (40%)
to be responsible for physical abuse
Cawson P., Wattam, C., Brooker, S., Kelly, G. (2000). “Child
maltreatment in the United Kingdom: A study for the prevalence of
child abuse and neglect.” London: National Society for the Prevention
of Cruelty to Children.
# Approximately five per cent of female and 20 per cent of male
victims experience sexual abuse perpetrated by a woman.
Finkelhor, Russell (1984) “Women as perpetrators.” In
D. Finkelhor (Ed.) Sexual abuse of children: New theory and research (pp.
171-187). New York: The Free Press.
# Women who fail to protect their child from sexual abuse may in
some cases be seen as at least partially responsible for that sexual
abuse.
Leventhal (1990) “Epidemiology of sexual abuse of children”.
In R. K. Oates (Ed.), Understanding and managing sexual abuse of children
(pp. 18-42). Sydney; Harcourt Brace Jovanovich.
# Approximately two-fifths (40.3%) of child victims were maltreated
by their mothers acting alone; another 19.1 percent were maltreated
by their fathers acting alone; 18.0 percent were abused by both their
mother and father.
# With these recorded results, it is somewhat surprising that the
factor of sole maternal residence is not considered in much of the
literature on child abuse. Numerous factors are considered as correlates
of child abuse including age and sex of the child, race, family income,
number of siblings and social status. While a number of Australian
studies have considered the effects of the family structure on child
victimisation, most merely refer to structure as part of the family
demographic information, noting the over-representation in their sample
(e.g. Goodard, Hiller 1992). However, results are not reported which
would indicate whether mothers were more prone to child abuse than
fathers, or if sole maternal residence––as compared to
joint residence, sole paternal residence, or intact family status––contributed
to an increased risk for child abuse. These are simple questions.
Yet these fundamental questions are not being addressed.
Goodard C R., Hiller P C. Tracking Physical and Sexual Abuse Cases
From A Hospital Setting Into Victoria’s Criminal Justice and
Child Protection Systems: A Report For The Victorian Law Foundation.
Vol 1-3 Department of Social Work and Department of Anthropology and
Sociology, Monash University Melbourne (1992)
# Sole residence arrangements may suffer an increased risk for
child abuse.
Ditson J, Shay S. Use of A Home-Based Microcomputer To Analyse Community
Data From Reported Cases On Child Abuse and Neglect. 8 Child Abuse
and Neglect (1984) pp 503-509
# Child abuse by perpetrator relationship, 2002
Perpetrator Status Percent of Victims
-
Mother Only 40.3 %
-
Father Only 19.1 %
-
Mother and Father 18.0 %
-
Mother and Other 5.4 %
-
Father and Other 1.0 %
-
Nonparental Perpetrator(s) 13.0 %
-
Unknown or Missing 3.2 %
2002 US Children’s Bureau statistics http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/cb/publications/cm02/chapterthree.htm#
perps U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Child Maltreatment
2002. Administration for Children and Families, Administration on
Children, Youth and Families www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/cb/publications/cm02/index.htm
Domestic violence statistics are often exaggerated or fraudulent.
# This research lists many examples of exaggerated or fraudulent
domestic violence statistics.
Domestic Violence Factoids Richard J. Gelles. University of Rhode
Island Family Violence Research Program, 1995. http://www.mincava.umn.edu/documents/factoid/factoid.html
Womens’ domestic violence against men
We believe that violence between parents is much less significance
than violence against children. Especially since previous violence
between parents is unlikely to continue after separation. Never-the-less
it is used as the justification of the Family Court to remove a father
from the lives of his children.
We have found 387 citations to published research showing that women’s
domestic violence to men has similar frequency as men’s to women.
The majority of the studies show that women are a little more likely
to initiate violence than men.
Many of them also note that the rate of injury is similar also,
with women more likely to use a weapon than men.
Homicide
In the US, wives kill their husbands at a similar rate to husbands
kill their wives. In Australia fewer men are killed. Since it is also
reported that women use weapons in their violence more often than
men, this would seem to be a result of the easy access to firearms
in the US. Put in other words, women are as violent as men, however
in Australia they simply lack the weaponry for their violence to be
as effective.
# (Of intimate partner violence) Curtis’ 1974 American study
showed the number of women murdered by men (17.5 per cent of total
homicides) was about the same as the number of men murdered by women
(16.4 per cent). This study, taken from police records, showed that
men were three times as likely to assault women as vice-versa.
Curtis (1974) Criminal violence: National patterns and behavior.
Lexington Books, Lexington MA.
# Wolfgang’s investigation of spousal homicides between 1948
and 1952 found that 7.8 per cent of murder victims were husbands murdered
by wives and eight per cent were wives murdered by husbands.
Wolfgang (1958) Patterns in Criminal Homicide. Wiley, New York,
1958.
# Mercy, Saltzman’s 1989 study of U.S. spousal homicides
between 1976 and 1985 found there was an overall ratio of 1.3:1 of
murdered wives to murdered husbands, with “Black husbands…
at greater risk of spousal homicide victimization than Black wives
or White spouses of either sex.”
Mercy, Saltzman (1989) “Fatal violence among spouses in the
United States, 1976-85” In the American Journal of Public Health
79(5): pp. 595-599. May 1989.
# Two separate studies – conducted 30 years apart –
showed that on average wives kill their husbands at a similar rate
to that at which husbands kill their wives.
Wolfgang: "Patterns in Criminal Homicide." Wiley. New
York. 1958.
Mercy, Saltzman. Fatal violence among spouses in the United States,
1976-1985. American Journal of Public Health 79 (5). pp.595-599. 1989.
# Less than half the female murderers have a history of being beaten.
Most women who murder their husbands are impulsive, violent and have
criminal records.
An investigation of 24 cases in which women killed their partners
found that the victim initiated physical forces in 40 per cent of
the cases. Only five of the 24 homicides (21 per cent) were in response
to “prior abuse” or “threat of abuse/death.”
Jurik. Women who kill and the reasonable man: the legal issues
surrounding female-perpetrated homicide. Paper presented at the 41st
Annual Meeting of the American Society of Criminology. Reno, Nevada.
November 1989.
Jurik, Gregware. A method for murder: An interactionist analysis
of homicides by women. Tempe. Arizona State University. School of
Justice Studies. 1989.
Mann . Black female homicide in the United States. Journal of Interpersonal
Violence 5. pp.176-201. 1990.
# In July 1994 the Bureau of Justice Statistics of the U. S. Department
of Justice released a Special Report detailing the results of a survey
of family homicides in 33 urban U. S. counties. The report said:
“But in spouse murders, women represented 41 per cent of
killers. In murders of their offspring, women predominated, accounting
for 55 per cent of killers.
“Among black marital partners, wives were just about as likely
to kill their husbands as husbands were to kill their wives: 47
per cent of the victims of a spouse were husbands and 53 per cent
were wives.”
U.S. Department of Justice, 1994
# A 1984 study of 6200 cases found that 86 per cent of female-on-male
violence involved weapons, contrasted with 25 per cent in cases of
male-on-female violence.
McLeod, Justice Quarterly (2). 1984. pp 171-193
Violence
# According to local researchers Headey et.al., one important limitation
of sample surveys such as the 1996 survey on violence against women
is that they: “… suffer from having just sampled women,
even though two national studies in the United States a decade ago
showed no significant difference between physical assault rates experienced
by male and female partners.”
“Men were just as likely to report being physically assaulted
by their partners as women. Further men and women were equally about
likely to admit being violent themselves.”
“Men and women report experiencing the same level of pain
and need for medical attention resulting from domestic violence.”
“Violence runs in couples. In over 50 per cent of partnerships
in which violence occurred both partners struck each other.”
Headey, colleagues say that “the first two results ran counter
to conventional wisdom… Some degree of confirmation…derives
from the fact that mens’ and womens’ reports on rates
of domestic violence more or less agree. If women are to be believed
(as they have been by previous investigators), then so are the men.
Further, the results relating to women being as violent as men are
in line with some recent American research.”
Headey, B., Scott, D., deVaus, D. Domestic Violence in Australia:
Are women and men equally violent? 1999. University of Melbourne.
# 828 young adults in NZ (437 women and 391 men) were interviewed
about the domestic violence in their most recent relationship. Key
findings of the study were:
(a) domestic conflict was present in 70% of relationships, with
this conflict ranging from minor psychological abuse to severe assault;
(b) men and women reported similar experiences of victimization
and perpetration of domestic violence; and
(c) exposure to domestic violence was significantly related to increased
risks of major depression (p , .05) and suicidal ideation (p , .005)
even after controlling for other possible factors.
DAVID M. FERGUSSON, L. JOHN HORWOOD, AND ELIZABETH M. RIDDER. Partner
Violence and Mental Health Outcomes in a New Zealand Birth Cohort.
Journal of Marriage and Family 67 (December 2005): 1103–1119.
Christchurch School of Medicine, Health Sciences.
# Most Intimate partner violence incidents are not reported to the
police. About 20 per cent of Intimate partner violence rapes or sexual
assaults, 25 per cent of physical assaults, and 50 per cent of stalkings
directed toward women are reported. Even fewer Intimate partner violence
incidents against men are reported. Thus, it is believed that available
data greatly underestimate the true magnitude of the problem.
In the United States each year, about 1.5 million women and more
than 800,000 men are raped or physically assaulted by an intimate
partner. This translates into about 47 Intimate partner violence assaults
per 1,000 women and 32 assaults per 1,000 men.
In 2002, 76 per cent of Intimate partner violence homicide victims
were female and 24 per cent were male.
Tjaden P, Thoennes N. Extent, nature, and consequences of intimate
partner violence: findings from the National Violence Against Women
Survey. Washington (DC): Department of Justice (US); 2000a. Publication
No. NCJ 181867. [cited 2005 September 15]. Available from: URL: www.ojp.usdoj.gov/nij/pubs-sum/181867.htm.
# In a study comparing male and female domestic violence, researchers
found that 47 per cent of husbands had used physical violence against
their wives whilst 33 per cent of women had used violence on their
husbands. Half of the respondents in this study were selected from
either cases of domestic violence reported to the police or cases
identified by the social service agency.
As very few men report being assaulted by their wives, there is
a lower statistic for violent females. Later studies, however, are
more accurate.
Gelles (1974) “The violent home: A study of physical aggression
between husbands and wives” Beverly Hills, CA: Sage Publications
# Women are equally violent towards men in intimate relationships.
One of the bases for Chesanow’s arguments is that domestic violence
– based on crime statistics – among lesbian intimates
is as common as domestic violence among heterosexual intimates.
Chesanow (1992) “Violence at Home”. New Woman, February
1992, pp. 96-98.
# Several studies showing that the percentage of wives who have
used physical violence is higher than the percentage of husbands and
that the average violence score of wives tended to be higher although
men were somewhat more likely to cause greater injury. Women were
found to be as likely to initiate physical violence as men, with similar
motives as men for their violent acts.
Steinmetz (1977-78) The Cycle of violence: Assertive, aggressive
and abusive family interaction. Praeger Press, New York, 1977; “The
Battered Husband Syndrome” Victimology 2, 1977-78.
# A telephone survey in which subjects were asked about their experiences
of domestic violence, finding that 15.5 per cent of men and 11.3 per
cent of women reported having hit their spouse. 18.6 per cent of men
and 12.7 per cent of women surveyed reported having been hit by their
spouse.
Nisonoff, Bitman (1979) Spouse Abuse: Incidence and Relationship
to Selected Demographic Variables Victimology 4, 1979, pp.131-140.
# An attempt to address some of the concerns arising from earlier
surveys, creating a (U.S.) nationally-representative study of family
violence, finding the total violence scores seemed to be about even
between husbands and wives, with wives tending to be more abusive
in almost all categories except pushing and shoving.
Straus, Gelles and Steinmetz (1980) Behind closed doors: Violence
in American families. Doubleday, New York, 1980.
# A followup survey, comparing data against that of a 1975 survey.
In the intervening decade, the researchers found that domestic violence
against women had dropped from 12.1 per cent to 11.3 per cent whilst
domestic violence against men had risen from 11.6 per cent to 12.1
per cent. The rate of severely violent incidents dropped for both
groups (from 3.8 per cent to 3.0 per cent for women victimized and
from 4.6 per cent to 4.4 per cent for men).
Straus, Gelles (1986) Societal change and change in family violence
from 1975 to 1985 as revealed by two national surveys. Journal of
Marriage and the Family 48, pp. 465-479. 1986.
# A 1986 report in the journal of the (U.S.) National Association
of Social Workers stated that girls were more frequently violent than
boys in adolescent dating relationships.
Sexuality Today Newsletter “Violence in Adolescent Dating
Relationships Common, New Survey Reveals” (Dec. 1986)
# Another report on premarital violence found that 34 per cent
of males and 40 per cent of females reported engaging in some form
of physical aggression against their mates in a year; 17 per cent
of women and 7 per cent of men reported engaging in severe physical
aggression whilst 35 per cent of the men surveyed and 30 per cent
of the women reported having been abused.
O’Leary, Daniel, Arais, Rosenbaum, Barling: Premarital Physical
Aggression: State University of New York at Stony Brook, Syracuse
University.
# Wives are more violent then husbands, although men and women
reported quite similar instances of violence both by themselves and
by their partners.
Nisonoff, Bitman. Spouse Abuse: Incidence and Relationship to Selected
Demographic Variables. Victimology 4. 1979 pp. 131-140.
Steinmetz. The Battered Husband Syndrome. Victimology 2, 1977-78.
p.499. The cycle of violence: Assertive, aggressive and abusive family
interaction. Praeger Press. New York. 1977.
# Spousal abuse is almost gender-neutral in almost all categories
of violence.
Straus, Murray, Gelles, Steinmetz. Behind closed doors: Violence
in American families. Doubleday. New York. 1980
# Domestic violence by women is increasing whilst domestic violence
by men is decreasing. A more recent study, reported at a conference
by Straus, shows this trend to be continuing.
Straus, Gelles. Societal change and change in family violence from
1975 to 1985 as revealed by two national surveys. Journal of Marriage
and the Family 48, pp. 465-479. 1986.
# In a longitudinal study of early marriage, a community of 272
couples were assessed. More women then men in this group reported
physically aggressing against their partners at premarriage (44 per
cent v. 31 per cent), and 18 months after marriage (36 per cent v.
27 per cent). At 30 months, women did not report significantly different
rates of aggression (32 per cent v. 25 per cent). However, using either
the self-report or the partner’s report, the prevalence of aggression
was higher for women than for men at each assessment period.
O’Leary, Barling, Arias, Rosenbaum, Malone, Tyree. Prevalence
and stability of physical aggression between spouses: a longitudinal
analysis. Journal of Consulting, Clinical Psychology. 57 (2). pp.
263-268. April 1989.
# In fact, some degree of violence occurs at a rate of 113 incidents
per 1000 couples per year (husband on wife) and 121 incidents per
1000 couples per year (wife on husband).
Straus, M. A., Gelles, R. J. Societal change and change in family
violence from 1975 to 1985 as revealed by two national surveys. Journal
of Marriage and the Family 48. 1986. pp. 465-479.
# Of every 100 families, 3.8 experience severer husband-to-wife
violence, but 4.5 per cent experience severe wife-to-husband violence.
Straus, Gelles, Steinmetz. Behind Closed Doors: Violence in American
Families. 1980.
# A 1985 study of Texas University students found that 18 per cent
of men and 14 per cent of women reported a violent act by a romantic
partner. In the same study, 28 per cent of married men reported that
their wives had slapped, punched or kicked them.
Shupe, Stacey, Hazlewood. Violent Men, Violent Couples. 1986. Chapter
3.
# In another study, 15.5 per cent of men and 11.3 per cent of women
reported having hit a spouse while 18.6 per cent of men and 12 per
cent of women report being struck by a spouse. Nisnof, Bitman. Victimology
4. 1979. pp. 131-140.
# A sample of 1,643 subjects (804 men, 839 women) responded to
questions about their experience with domestic violence in the previous
12 months. The results revealed that 5.7 per cent of men and 3.7 per
cent of women reported being victims of domestic assaults. With regard
to injuries, results revealed that women inflict serious injuries
at least as frequently as men. 1.8 per cent of men and 1.2 per cent
of women reported that their injuries needed first aid, whilst 1.5
per cent of men and 1.1 per cent of women reported that their injuries
needed treatment by a doctor or a nurse.
Headey, B., Scott, D., deVaus, D. Domestic Violence in Australia:
Are women and men equally violent? 1999. University of Melbourne.
# The British Crime Survey reported in 1996 that an equal proportion
(4.2 per cent) of men and women had said they had been physically
assaulted by a current of former spouse or lover in the past year,
with 41 per cent of these assaults resulting in injuries.
47 per cent of women and 31 per cent of men assaulted had sustained
injuries during the assault/s.
Phillips, Melanie, 2000 “Man beaters behind closed doors”
The Sunday Times. London, 19 November 2000.
# Spousal assaults expressed as rate per 1000 couples
Assault by husband Assault by wife
-
Minor Assaults: 90.6 89
-
Severe Assaults 29 45
Change In Spouse Assault Rates From 1975 to 1992: A Comparison of
Three National Surveys In The United States", by Murray A. Straus
and Glenda Kaufman Kantor.
# A 2005 report on domestic violence released by the NSW Bureau of
Crime Statistics and Research (BOCSAR) found that a surprising number
of the domestic violence incidents recorded by police involve male victims.
Where the victim is younger than 15 or older than 39, male victims outnumber
female victims (by more than two-to-one for the younger age group).
# A study of 582 college men found that up to 78 per cent of those
abused as children had been abused by females.
Fromuth, M., Burkhart, B. Childhood Sexual Victimization Among College
Men: Definitions and Methological Issues. Violence and Victim. 1987.
Volume 2. No 4. pp. 241-253.
# A U.S. national study found that 29 per cent of women and 22 per
cent of men had experienced physical, sexual, or psychological Intimate
partner violence during their lifetime.
Coker AL, Davis KE, Arias I, Desai S, Sanderson M, Brandt HM, et al.
Physical and mental health effects of intimate partner violence for
men and women. American Journal of Preventive Medicine 2002;23(4):260–8.
First Punch
% of the time that wives admitted to hitting first: 53
- Physical Assaults by Wives, 1993 (US)
Going for the Knife
-
% of women knifed by their spouse or partner: 4.1
-
% of men knifed by their spouse or partner: 11
- The Risk of Serious Physical Injury from Assault by a Woman Intimate,
1999 (US)
Losing It
Number of wives/husbands who hit or tried to hit their spouse with
something:
-
30 wives per 1,000
-
17 husbands per 1,000
- US National Family Violence Survey, 1985
Totally Losing It
Number of wives/husbands who engaged in severe violence against
their spouse:
-
46 wives per 1,000
-
30 husbands per 1,000
- US National Family Violence Survey, 1985
Co-ed Violence
-
32% of college women who admitted to initiating violence against
their boyfriend:
-
46% who said it was because their boyfriend wasn't sensitive to
their needs:
-
43% who said it was because their boyfriend wasn't listening:
- College women who initiate assaults on their male partners and
the reasons offered for such behaviour Fiebert, M S 1997 pp.583-590
Kid Abuse
-
61% of all child abuse committed by mothers:
-
38% of all child abuse committed by fathers:
Child maltreatment : reports from the states to the National Center
on Child Abuse and Neglect National Clearinghouse on Child Abuse,
Neglect Information (U.S.) 1995
Termination of Childhood
55% of murdered kids killed by their mothers:
- Murder in Families 1994, US Bureau of Justice Statistics
Blind Justice
In a survey of 6,002 people,
-
0% of incidents in which women were arrested after their husbands
called the police:
-
15% of incidents in which men were arrested after their wives
called the police:
-
12% of incidents in which men were arrested after they called
the police:
- US National Family Violence Survey, 1985
Domestic Homicide
-
60% of female murderers who killed an intimate or family member:
-
20% of male murderers who killed an intimate or family member:
- Women Offenders 1999, US Bureau of Justice Statistics
Sentencing Stats
-
81% of women receiving prison sentences for murdering their spouse:
-
94% of men receiving prison sentences:
- Spouse Murder Defendants in Large Urban Counties 1995, US Bureau
of Justice Statistics
Prison Terms
Length of prison sentences given to women convicted of spousal
abuse compared to those given to men: 10 years shorter
- Spouse Murder Defendants in Large Urban Counties 1995, US Bureau
of Justice Statistics
Dumb Justice
-
27% of women acquitted by a jury in a spouse murder trial:
-
0% of men acquitted:
- Spouse Murder Defendants in Large Urban Counties 1995, US Bureau
of Justice Statistics
Calls from the Bench
-
37% of women acquitted by a judge in a spouse murder trial:
-
17% of men acquitted:
- Spouse Murder Defendants in Large Urban Counties 1995, US Bureau
of Justice Statistics
Capital Punishment
-
33% of all domestic homicides committed by women:
-
1% of all the inmates on Death Row who are women:
- Capital Punishment 1998, US Bureau of Justice Statistics
Women on Women 1
Number of violent crimes committed by women each year in the United
States: 2.1 million
75% that are simple assaults on other women:
- Women Offenders 1999, US Bureau of Justice Statistics
Women on Women II
-
40% of lesbians abused by their current or most recent partners:
-
18% of gay men abused by their current or most recent partners:
- Lesbians in Currently Aggressive Relationships: How Frequently
Do They Report Aggressive Past Relationships? 1991 (US)
Instinct to Swing
During one survey of corporal punishment of children, % of mothers
who hit their child during the interview: 6.2%
- Corporal Punishment by Mothers and Child's Cognitive Development,
1998 (US)
All cited in:
Sara Vigneri “The Abuse Index: Who's Throwing Stuff and Who's
Getting Hit.” Men's Health (USA/Canada) May 2000 Vol 15, Issue
4, p150, 3/4p, 1bw
False allegations and perjury
We have found 5 citations to published research that show that
false accusations are frequent in the Family Court
False allegations and perjury in the Family Court are common tactics.
Since they prevent the Court from being to determine the best interest
of the child, they must be considered as abusive. The perjurer should
have their custody decreased as they are clearly demonstrating that
they put their own interests above the child's.
# Allegations of sexual abuse during a custody dispute there is
a greatly increased likelihood that the allegations are false.
Yates Alayne; Musty Tim (Aug 1988). Pre-school children’s
erroneous allegations of sexual molestation, American Journal of Psychiatry,
145 (8), 989-92.
Gardner Richard (1992). True and false accusations of sexual abuse,
Creative therapeutics, New Jersey.
# Some studies have found that 50% or more of allegations arising
in the context of custody access disputes were false.
Benedek and Schetky (1985). 'Allegations of sexual abuse in child
custody and visitation disputes', Emerging issues in child psychiatry
and the law, pp 145-56, Brunner/Mazel, New York.
Brant and Sink (1984). 'Dilemmas in court-ordered evaluation of
sexual abuse charges during custody and visitation proceedings', Paper
presented at 31st Annual Meeting of American Academy of Child Psychiatry,
Ontario, Canada.
Green (1986). 'True and false allegations of sexual abuse in child
custody disputes', Journal of American Academy of Child and Adolescent
Psychiatry, 25, 449-56.
Parental alienation
Children nearly always want both parents, they don’t want
their parents to separate. However occasionally an abusive parent
can coach the children to reject the other parent. This is called
parental alienation syndrome (PAS). Contact with non-resident parents
often decreases over time, due to the emotional difficulties in maintaining
these part-time relationships.
This is the classic example of damaging children to hurt the Ex.
Parental alienation relies on one parent having the majority of time
with the children. Because mostly it’s mothers that have majority
custody of children is why American talk shows have started calling
this ‘malicious mother syndrome’. 50-50 shared parenting
makes it difficult for one parent to brainwash and alienate the kids
because the children have meaningful relationships with both parents.
# Parental Alienation is a campaign of denigration against a good,
loving parent. It results from the combination of a programming (brainwashing)
parent’s indoctrinations and the child’s own contributions
to the vilification of the target parent. It is abusive because with
the result that they became permanently estranged from loving fathers.
Richard A. Gardner. M.D. American Journal of Family Therapy 30(3):191-202
(2002). Denial of the Parental Alienation Syndrome Also Harms Women.
Columbia University, New York, New York, USA
# This kind of communication has at least two psychologically destructive
effects.
-
First, it puts the child squarely in the middle of a contest of
loyalty. No matter what the choice, the child is very likely to
end up feeling painfully guilty and confused.
-
Second, the child is required to make a shift in assessing reality.
One parent is presented as being totally to blame for all problems,
and as someone who is devoid of any positive characteristics. Both
of these assertions represent on parent's distortions of reality.
Brainwashing In Custody Cases: The Parental Alienation Sydrome by
Doctor Ken Byrne. [Reproduced from an article in 4 (3) The Australian
Family Lawyer (1989) pp 1-5]
Custodial parents frequently obstruct visitation
A great deal of importance is placed on minimising trauma of separation
and change for the children during the divorce.
Generally, children see both parents every day while their parents
are together. Custody orders should reflect that reality as closely
as possible and shared residence is the best practical way of achieving
this.
The court does not penalise the custodial parent who prevents the
other parent from spending time with his children, even if court ordered
it the best interest of the child. Too often the result is that the
child loses the benefit of having a relationship with her father and
all the damage and risks involved in that.
For example; a father turns up for a court-ordered visitation and
the mother refuses to open the door. What can he do? He waves the
court order around in the air an is ignored; he calls the police and
they say they can’t intervene; he goes back to the Family Court
seeking some form of enforcement and gets another piece of paper as
useless as the first one.
The Family Court must enforce it’s own orders. We have found
9 citations to research that demonstrates that the custodial parent
frequently abuses their power to the detriment of the child.
Many custodial mothers believe that there is no benefit in dad’s
involvement, but apart from the dangers for kids living with a sole
parent, it is a human right’s violation under the UN Convention
on the Rights of the Child
We have found 21 citations showing that the ongoing relationship
with the non-custodial parents is often sabotaged or destroyed by
the custodial parent. Again, this situation is made worse by the Family
Court’s refusal to enforce its own orders.
# 50% of non-resident fathers had a problem with the breakdown of
court ordered contact due to opposition by an ex-spouse.
Gibson J. Non-Custodial Fathers and Access Patterns: Family Court
of Australia. Office of The Chief Executive. Summary of Key Findings.
Research report No. 10. Australian Government Publishing. Service
Canberra (1992).
50% of fathers had a problem with the breakdown of court ordered
contact due to opposition by an ex-spouse; 66% of fathers reported
that contact periods were always too short; 73% of fathers wanted
increased contact with their children; 75% of fathers rated as poor
the relationship with an ex-spouse
# Interviews with 560 divorced adults about the impact of the divorce
in their lives and in the lives of their children. One third of those
fathers were not satisfied with the residence decision, and indicated
they wanted a change.
Victimisation was shown by the self–reports of resident mothers,
40% of whom indicated that they had denied contact between father
and child at least once out of spite. Even more of the non–resident
fathers (53%) claimed that their ex–wives had refused to let
them see the children at one time or another.
Further, the majority of the mothers did not involve their former
spouses in matters concerning the children. Expressing the sentiments
of many mothers, one mother said “and what’s more, I don’t
intend to”. Because of the nature of the data and the unflattering
light cast upon the resident mothers answering that particular question,
the 40% figure may be an understatement.
Fulton J A. Parental Reports of Children’s Post-Divorce Adjustment.
35 Journal of Social Issues (1979) pp 126-13
# Mothers, fathers, and children were assessed over a five-year
period. Only half of the resident mothers indicated that they valued
the continued contact between the father and his children. 20% of
the custodial mothers in their research sample directly attempted
to sabotage the relationship between the children and their fathers.
A further 20% of custodial mothers saw no value in continuing the
relationship and may have sabotaged it in more subtle ways. Clearly
placing the parenthood status of fathers in the hands of those sole
residence mothers assures the intentional victimisation of many fathers
as well as their children.
Wallerstein J S, Kelly J B. Surviving The Breakup: How Children
and Parents Cope With Divorce. Basic Books, New York (1980)
# 14(3) Australian Journal of Marriage and Family (1992) pp 151-159
at p 153.
See also:
McMurray A. Parenting Without Custody: A Guide For Survival. Harper
Collins Publishers, Sydney (1995).
# “A family move, regardless of its reason, disrupts the living
environment of the child and can require important adjustments for
the child and family. Children in families with fewer resources are
probably more at risk of experiencing psychological or behavioural
problems due to the stress of a move, especially when a move is compounded
by other negative family events such as divorce, eviction from the
family home, or parental job loss. As such family moves can potentially
contribute to psychological morbidity or behavioural problems. These
and other ‘morbidities’ are being recognised with increasing
frequency by providers of health care for children.
Journal of The American Medical Association. Impact of Family Relocation
On Children’s Growth, Development, School Function, and Behaviour.
JAMA (15 September 1993)
# Moving home is likely a big culprit in the poorer performance
of these children, for such moves tend to decrease school achievement
for most children, regardless of family background.
McLanahan S, Sandefer G D. Growing Up With A Single Parent: What
Hurts, What Helps. Harvard University Press, Cambridge, MA (1994),
reported in William S, Aquilino W S. The Life Course of Children Born
To Unmarried Mothers: Childhood Living Arrangements and Young Adult
Outcomes. 58 Journal of Marriage and The Family (May 1996) pp 293-310.
# But compared to children of intact families, children of divorced
families move much more frequently.
Goldschdeider F K, Goldsheider C. The Effects of Childhood Family
Structure On Leaving and Returning Home. 60 Journal of Marriage and
The Family (1998) p751
# Moving houses tend to increase behavioural, emotional and academic
problems for all adolescents regardless of family structure.
Hoffman J P, Johnson R A. A National Portrait of Family Structure
and Adolescent Drug Use. 60 Journal of Marriage and The Family (1998)
p 635.
# When very young children leave their original family home for
another, because of their parents’ divorce, the move is even
more traumatic because they tend to become even more attached to their
family home during the break up of their parents
Stirtzinger R, Cholvat L. Preschool Age Children of Divorce: Transitional
Phenomena and The Mourning Process. 35 Canadian Journal of Psychiatry
(1990) pp 506-514.
# Compared to non-resident fathers, twice as many non-resident
mothers failed to maintain contact.
Schaefer M P. Children’s Adjustment In Contested Mother Custody,
Father Custody Homes. Paper presented at the 66th annual meeting of
the American Orthopsychiatric Association, 3 April 1989.
McMurray A, Blackmore A M. Influences On Parent-Child Relationships
On Non-Custodial Fathers. 14(3) Australian Journal of Marriage and
Family (1992) pp 151-159 at p153
# 50% of non-resident fathers had a problem with the breakdown
of court ordered contact due to opposition by an ex-spouse.
Gibson J. Non-Custodial Fathers and Access Patterns: Family Court
of Australia. Office of The Chief Executive. Summary of Key Findings.
Research report No. 10. Australian Government Publishing. Service
Canberra (1992).
50% of fathers had a problem with the breakdown of court ordered
contact due to opposition by an ex-spouse; 66% of fathers reported
that contact periods were always too short; 73% of fathers wanted
increased contact with their children; 75% of fathers rated as poor
the relationship with an ex-spouse
# 20% of the mothers in their research sample saw no value in the
relationship between the child and their non-resident father and tried
to actively sabotage contact.
McMurray A, Blackmore A M. Influences On Parent-Child Relationships
On Non-Custodial Fathers. 14(3) Australian Journal of Marriage and
Family (1992) pp 151-159 at p 153.
See also:
McMurray A. Parenting Without Custody: A Guide For Survival. Harper
Collins Publishers, Sydney (1995).
# Local and overseas research indicates that between 20% and 50%
of custodial mothers directly attempted to sabotage the relationship
between children and their non-resident fathers.
McMurray, A., Blackmore, A.M. (1992). “Influences On Parent-Child
Relationships On Non-Custodial Fathers”. Australian Journal
of Marriage and Family. Vol.14, No.3 pp.151-159
Gibson, J. (1992). “Non-custodial fathers and access patterns”.
Family Court of Australia. Research Report No.10. Australian Government
Publishing Service, Canberra
Fulton, J.A. (1979). “Parental reports on children’s
post-divorce adjustment”. Journal of Social Issues, Vol. 35,
pp.126-139
Wallerstein, J.S., Kelly, J.B. (1980). Surviving the breakup: How
children and parents cope with divorce. Basic Books, New York
# Researchers recommend that in a child’s best interests,
the job of the courts is to protect children from emotional damage
by safeguarding the child’s relationship with each parent to
the fullest extent possible.
Williams F S. Child Custody and Parental Cooperation. Paper presented
at American Bar Association Family Law Section (1987).
Kelly J B (1988a). Longer-Term Adjustment In Children of Divorce:
Converging Findings and Implications For Practice. 2 Journal of Family
Psychology pp 119-140
# Compared to non-resident fathers, twice as many non-resident
mothers failed to maintain contact.
Schaefer M P. Children’s Adjustment In Contested Mother Custody,
Father Custody Homes. Paper presented at the 66th annual meeting of
the American Orthopsychiatric Association, 3 April 1989.
McMurray A, Blackmore A M. Influences On Parent-Child Relationships
On Non-Custodial Fathers. 14(3) Australian Journal of Marriage and
Family (1992) pp 151-159 at p153
Custodial parent moving
So much weight is placed on minimising disruption for children in
divorce. The fact that the mother is typically the main carer for
the kids is used to justify giving the children to the mother and
allowing minimal time with dad.
However when a custodial parent decides to move away, the change
forced on the kids is immense. New city, new house, new school, loss
of friends… and loss of the remaining attachment to their dad.
Why is shared residence with dad traumatic, but taking them to a
new city is somehow not considered to be emotional abuse?
We have found 7 citations demonstrating risk inflicted on children
who are forced to move to a new home.
# It is precisely joint residence that allows parenting consistency
to continue after separation. To break the bond between the child
and one parent arbitrarily is to destroy continuity of care. They
argue that joint residence allows both adults the gratification of
parenting.
Roman M, Haddad W. The Disposable Parent: The Case For Joint Custody.
Holt, Rinehart, Winston, New York (1978)
# “A family move, regardless of its reason, disrupts the
living environment of the child and can require important adjustments
for the child and family. Children in families with fewer resources
are probably more at risk of experiencing psychological or behavioural
problems due to the stress of a move, especially when a move is compounded
by other negative family events such as divorce, eviction from the
family home, or parental job loss. As such family moves can potentially
contribute to psychological morbidity or behavioural problems. These
and other ‘morbidities’ are being recognised with increasing
frequency by providers of health care for children.
Journal of The American Medical Association. Impact of Family Relocation
On Children’s Growth, Development, School Function, and Behaviour.
JAMA (15 September 1993)
# Moving home is likely a big culprit in the poorer performance
of these children, for such moves tend to decrease school achievement
for most children, regardless of family background.
McLanahan S, Sandefer G D. Growing Up With A Single Parent: What
Hurts, What Helps. Harvard University Press, Cambridge, MA (1994),
reported in William S, Aquilino W S. The Life Course of Children Born
To Unmarried Mothers: Childhood Living Arrangements and Young Adult
Outcomes. 58 Journal of Marriage and The Family (May 1996) pp 293-310.
# But compared to children of intact families, children of divorced
families move much more frequently.
Goldschdeider F K, Goldsheider C. The Effects of Childhood Family
Structure On Leaving and Returning Home. 60 Journal of Marriage and
The Family (1998) p751
# Moving houses tend to increase behavioural, emotional and academic
problems for all adolescents regardless of family structure.
Hoffman J P, Johnson R A. A National Portrait of Family Structure
and Adolescent Drug Use. 60 Journal of Marriage and The Family (1998)
p 635.
# When very young children leave their original family home for
another, because of their parents’ divorce, the move is even
more traumatic because they tend to become even more attached to their
family home during the break up of their parents.
Stirtzinger R, Cholvat L. Preschool Age Children of Divorce: Transitional
Phenomena and The Mourning Process. 35 Canadian Journal of Psychiatry
(1990) pp 506-514.
# In the fist ‘move-away’ test-case after the last round
of ineffective Family Law changes. “The (Family Court) Judge
feared that if he did not let the mother (move interstate) she would
become depressed and hence less able to look after her children. So
it was in the best interests of the children to be removed from their
school, their friends, their father and their father’s family
and placed at the other end of the continent… (Family Court
judges) are the last upholders of the view that women are fragile
creatures.”
John Hirst, Kangaroo Court. Quarterly Essay 17, Black Ink, Schwartz
Publishing 2005 ISBN 186 395 3418 p63.
Neglect and emotional abuse
Mothers are clearly the perpetrators of the vast majority of emotional
abuse and neglect of children. This is partly due to the long hours
of childminding and social isolation forced on mothers.
50-50 shared residence between the parents would allow the mother
to have a more-balanced life and reduce the frustrations and responsibilities
of sole-parenthood.
We have found 6 citations showing that the majority of this abuse
is perpetrated by mothers.
# Children are at the greatest risk of all forms of child abuse
when they are being raised by solo mothers, without input from the
fathers. It is ironic that so often current child protection policies
result in the removal of children from father’s care.
Gelles R.J. (Oct 1988). Child abuse and violence in single–parent
families: parent absence and economic depravation, American Journal
Of Orthopsychiatry, 9 (4), 492–501
Ditson J, Shay S (1984). Use of Home–Based Microcomputers
To Analyse Community Data From Reported Cases On Child Abuse And Neglect
Child Abuse And Neglect, 8, 503–509.
MacMillan HL, MacMillan JH, Offord D (1993). Periodic health examination,
1993. Update 1 – Primary prevention of child maltreatment, Canadian
Medical Association Journal, 148, 151-163.
# Mothers were perpetrators in 79% of proven emotional abuse, and
85% in cases of neglect.
Report of The Institute For The Prevention Of Child Abuse (1994).
Ontario Incidence Study Of Reported Child Abuse And Neglect, pp 67,
82, 83, xii, cited in The silence of the screams: violence by women
in intimate relationships, complied by CSAG (Child Support Action
Group Incorporated in South Australia), researched by Yuri Joakimidis,
1996.
# Neglect is by far the most common form of child mistreatment.
In 1994 about one million cases of child maltreatment were substantiated
in the United States. Nearly half of these were cases of neglect;
over a quarter were physical abuse; about 10% were sexual abuse and
the remainder were cases of emotional or other unspecified abuse.
AACAP Official Action (1997). Practice parameters for the forensic
evaluation of children and adolescents who may have been physically
or sexually abused,
Journal of American Academy of Child, adolescent Psychiatry, 36
(10), Supplement, 37S-56S.
# Women, are responsible for the majority of non-sexual child maltreatment.
Report of The Institute For The Prevention Of Child Abuse (1994).
Ontario Incidence Study Of Reported Child Abuse And Neglect, pp 67,
82, 83, xii, cited in The silence of the screams: violence by women
in intimate relationships, complied by CSAG (Child Support Action
Group Incorporated in South Australia), researched by Yuri Joakimidis,
1996.
Joint residence is what children want
Overwhelmingly, children want to maintain close relationships with
both their natural parents.
We have found 18 citations to research demonstrating that children’s
wishes are nearly for a continued meaningful relationship with both
parents.
# Joint residence is what children want, because it allows kids
to continue their relationship with both parents. Each of the studies
that sought the views of children indicates that while they would
prefer the intact family of origin, they are satisfied with joint
residence and value the opportunity to continue their relationship
with both parents.
Abarbanel A (1979). Shared Parenting After Separation and Divorce:
A Study of Joint Custody. 49 American Journal of Orthopsychiatry pp
320-329
# Data in Australia has confirmed overseas evidence reporting that
the children of divorce long for frequent ongoing contact with their
absent parent and suffer immensely if this relationship is severed
or severely limited.
Family Law Council. Patterns of Parenting After Separation: A Report
To The Minister For Justice and Consumer Affairs. Australian Publishing
Service, Canberra (April 1992). Hereinafter Patterns of Parenting
# Most children considered having two homes advantageous and worth
the effort of making the transition between homes because it enabled
them to remain close to both parents. Joint residence does not create
uncertainty and confusion for most youngsters about either the arrangements
or about the finality of the divorce.
Luepnitz D A. A Comparison of Maternal, Paternal, and Joint Custody:
Understanding The Varieties of Post-Divorce Family Life. 9 Journal
of Divorce (1986) pp 1-12
# In spite of the relative inability of children to articulate
their feelings (at least compared to the average adult), their is
increasing evidence that children, when presented with the opportunity
to do so, have articulated their desire to maintain a loving, involved
relationship with both parents after divorce. This desire on the part
of children is understandable, given the evidence that children form
meaningful attachment bonds to both parents.
Thompson R. The Fathers Case In Child Custody Decisions: The Contributions
of Psychological Research. In M E Lamb, A Sargi (Editors), Fatherhood
and Social Policy. Erlbaum, Hillsdale, New Jersey (1983). pp 50-100
# Nearly all the joint residence children were content with the
arrangement. These children echoed the sole residence children in
responding to the question, “With whom would you have wanted
to live after the divorce?” by saying, “With both”.(p
47). The joint residence children were able to cite specific advantages
in the two–household lifestyle. They described their arrangement
as more fun, more interesting or more comfortable.
Luepnitz D A. (1982). Child Custody: A Study of Families After Divorce.
Lexington Books, Massachusetts
# There is considerable evidence demonstrating that the child and
his or her non–resident parent feel a strong reciprocal attachment
and, in fact, need one another.
Thompson R. The Fathers Case In Child Custody Decisions: The Contributions
of Psychological Research. In M E Lamb, A Sargi (Editors), Fatherhood
and Social Policy. Erlbaum, Hillsdale, New Jersey (1983). pp 50-100
Rohman L W, Sales B D, Lou M. The Best Interests of The Child In
Custody Disputes. In L A. Weihorn (Editor), Psychology and Child Custody
Determinations. University of Nebraska Press, Lincoln, Nebraska (1987)
# An earlier study conducted by the University of Michigan (1979)
that asked 165 school children in grades three to six from divorced
and intact families their residence preference, found that the majority
of interviewed children wanted to live half the week with one parent
and the remaining half of the week with their other parent. None of
the children in the divorced group had experienced this type of parenting.
The high prevalence of reconciliation fantasies among children in
sole residence arrangements would also seem to indicate a strong desire
for continued involvement of both parents in children's lives.
Recent local research adds weight to the view that children are
better off spending equal time with both parents after divorce. The
study is one of the first in Australia to look at how children feel
about spending time with their parents. When asked how parents should
care for children after divorce, the most common answer was half and
half" or "equal." Half also said they wanted more time
with their non-resident parents (Parkinson, Cashmore, Single 2003).
Parkinson P, Cashmore J, Single J (December 2003). Adolescents'
Views On the Fairness Of Parenting And Financial Arrangements. Faculty
of Law, University of Sydney
# This desire on the part of children is understandable, given
the evidence that children form meaningful attachment bonds to both
parents.
Thompson R (1983). The Fathers Case In Child Custody Decisions:
The Contributions of Psychological Research. In M E Lamb, A Sargi
(Editors), Fatherhood and Social Policy. Erlbaum, Hillsdale, New Jersey
pp 50-100
Rohman L W, Sales B D, Lou M (1987). The Best Interests of The
Child In Custody Disputes. In L A Weithorn (Editor), Psychology and
Child Custody Determinations. University of Nebraska Press, Lincoln
Nebraska
Warshak R A 4 October 2000). Blanket Restrictions: Overnight Contact
Between Parents And Young Children. 4(38) Family And Concilliation
Courts Review (pp 422-445
# In a research review Kelly summarizes children's own descriptions:
• The children continue a daily life with both parents, and
they consequently don't become strangers to each other.
• The children feel that it is Just: neither of the parents
is favoured.
• The children are less likely to feel guilty and/or to miss
their fathers.
• The children get to experience that they are loved and important
to both parents, which strengthens self-confidence.
• The boys continue to have a father as a role model for identification.
• There is no risk that contacts with either of the parents
will cease in the teenage years.
• It can feel good to have a rest from one of the parents (especially
for teenagers).
• A divorce is not experienced as a devastating loss, because
the child has not lost any love and important person from their daily
life (p 133).
Kelly J B (1988a). Longer-Term Adjustment In Children of Divorce:
Converging Findings and Implications For Practice. 2 Journal of Family
Psychology pp 119-140
# Joint residence, because it allows them to continue their relationship
with both parents is what children want and generally ask for. The
sole residence children in responding to the question, With whom would
you have wanted to live after the divorce? by saying, With both.
Abarbanel A. Shared Parenting After Separation and Divorce: A Study
of Joint Custody. 49 American Journal of Orthopsychiatry (1979) pp
320-329
Luepnitz D A. Child Custody: A Study of Families After Divorce.
Lexington Books, Massachusetts (1982)
# We have yet to read a study that concludes children prefer their
parents to go their separate ways than to stay together––even
when the domestic atmosphere is tense. The work undertaken so far
suggests that the ready accessibility of the non–resident parent,
is likely to be of considerable value in assisting children come to
terms with the reality of their changed predicament and in keeping
both parents alive for them.
Hetherington E M, Cox M, Cox R. Effects of Divorce On Parents and
Children. In M E Lamb (Editor), Non-traditional Families: Parenting
and Child Relationships. Lawrence Erlbaum, Hillsdale, New Jersey (1982)
pp 223–288
Hetherington E M, Hagan M S. Divorced Fathers, Stress, Coping,
and Adjustment. In M E Lamb (Editor), The Fathers Role: Applied Perspectives.
John Wiley, New York (1985) pp 103–134
Warshak R A. Father Custody and Child Development: A Review and
Analysis of Psychological Research. 4 Behavioural Science and The
Law (1986) pp 185–202
Warshak R A. The Custody Revolution: The Father Factor and The
Motherhood Mystique. Simon, Schuster, New York (1992)
Braver S L, O’Connell D. Divorced Dads: Shattering The Myths.
Tarcher/Putnan, New York (1998)
Shared parenting saves marriages.
Family law can be summarised by the saying “if you get the
kids, you get everything!” The house, any other assets including
the super, and ongoing tax-free CSA payments. In Australia, over two
thirds of divorces are initiated by the woman, partly because she
rarely has anything to lose. Shared parenting means the assets and
money are split. This removes the incentives for a women to divorce
her husband and thus decreases divorce rates. We have found three
citations to this difficult to research fact.
There is a significant correlation between joint physical custody
awards and reduced divorce. A parent who expects to receive sole custody
is more likely to file for divorce than one who may be awarded shared
custody. Sole custody allows one parent to hurt the other by taking
away the children, and usually involves higher child support payments.
Richard Kuhn and John Guidubaldi, "Child Custody Policies and
Divorce Rates in the U.S.," 11th Annual Conference of the Children's
Rights Council October 23-26, 1997. Washington, D.C.
The same correlation between joint physical custody awards and reduced
divorce has been found independently. Fathers are more likely to form
strong bonds with children if they know that their relationship would
be protected through joint physical custody in the even of a divorce.
This would reduce the likelihood that fathers would initiate divorce.
Margaret F. Brinig and F.H. Buckley, "Joint Custody: Bonding
and Monitoring Theories," 73 Indiana Law Journal 393 (1998).
The parent who receives custody is more likely to be the one who
files for divorce. That is, among cases where the mother received
custody, the mother usually filed for divorce, and where the father
received custody, the father was more likely to be the one who filed.
They concluded that filing behaviour is largely driven by attempts
to “exploit the other partner through divorce.”
Margaret F. Brinig and Douglas W. Allen. "These Boots are Made
for Walking: Why Wives File for Divorce," Canadian Law and Economics
Association Meeting, 1998.
Men want more time with their kids, but know they won’t get
it.
Far from being ‘deadbeat-dads’, most fathers want to
be actively involved with their children before and after divorce.
Official Family Court documents understate father’s real desires
because there is little point in fighting for more time than your
legal advice says is likely. It is also it is very expensive and painful.
We have found 15 citations to published research showing that fathers
want to spend more time with their children than they achieve.
Statistics published by the Family Court of Australia show that
only 2.5% (329) of residence orders were for joint residence. Commonwealth
of Australia (2003). Every picture tells a story: Report on the inquiry
into child custody arrangements in the event of family separation.
Canberra: House of Representatives Standing Committee on Family and
Community Affairs. p.22.
“in cases where there is any degree of conflict between the
parties (family court) judges had not embraced the concept of shared
parenting.” [Editor’s note: Now, think about that for
a moment… the Family Court is a still a court... who goes to
court unless there is conflict?]
The 14th Annual Family Law Masterclass Conference, Sydney, 10 May
2005 RECENT DEVELOPMENTS IN SHARED PARENTING AND JOINT CUSTODY, A
Personal View From the Court. JUSTICE ALWYNNE ROWLANDS AO.
# The advantages of joint residence provides specific
advantages for each parent
Luepnitz D A. (1982). Child Custody: A Study of Families After Divorce.
Lexington Books, Massachusetts
Hanson S M H (1985). Healthy Single Parent Families. 35 Family Relations
pp 125-132
# Post divorce can mean that fathers spend even less time with
their children. An Australian survey of 10,000 divorced fathers revealed
that 80% were advised by their lawyers that applying for residency
would be a waste of money as the family court would refuse their request.
Abernathy M. (April 1993) Paternity Wars In Australia, Divorce Is
A Battle Men Can’t Win. Australian Penthouse, at 106-107.)
# The typical Australian family has the mother working part-time,
and the father working overtime. Bureau of Statistics figures show
that Australian dads do 23hrs a week more paid work than Australian
mothers. Figures commissioned by the author from the Australian Bureau
of Statistics, 2005.
"You would be shocked how many men say, `I didn't know I had
a child until I got these court papers,'... And, when they find out,
almost all of them take steps to become involved in their child's
life, even if it's years after the child was born.
"Fathers should not be portrayed as generally not caring, because
they're not," he says. "When you're talking about deadbeats,
I think it's important to know that many, many guys are completely
cut out, because they were never told they were the father and then,
when they find out that they are the father, they want to start a
relationship with the child."
# A third of fathers work more than 50hrs a week. Two thirds of
fathers believe they did not spend enough time with their kids. Paid
work was often cited as the major barrier to spending time with their
kids.
Fitting Fathers Into Families: Men and the Fatherhood Role in Contemporary
Australia, Department of Family and Community Services. Commonwealth
of Australia 1999 ISBN 0 642 39934 4
# Studies have shown that around 50% of children from sole mother
custody families see their fathers once or twice a year or less.
Guidubaldi J. Differences In Children's Divorce Adjustment Across
Grade Level and Gender: A Report From the NASP-Kent State Nationwide
Project. In Wolchik, Karoly (Editors), Children of Divorce: Perspectives
and adjustment. Lexington Books, Lexington, MA (1989) pp 185-231.
Furstenberg F, Nord C, Zill N. The Life Course of Children of Divorce:
Marital Disruption and Parental Contact. 48 American Sociological
Review (October 1983) pp 656-668.
See also:
Furstenberg F F, Nord C W. Parenting Apart: Patterns of Childrearing
After Marital Disruption. 47 Journal of Marriage and The Family (1985)
pp 893-904
# The reason why so many children see their fathers so rarely is
because father’s parenting efforts are thwarted by restrictions
imposed by custodial mothers or gender biased court orders. The most
frequent reason for fathers' disengagement (90%) was obstruction of
paternal contact by the child's mother and her desire to break contact
between father and child. Fathers also mentioned that they ceased
contact because of their inability to adapt to the constraints of
the visiting situation (33%). Regardless of interpretation of motives,
the fact remains that sole maternal custody relates strongly to ultimate
father absence.
Kruk E. Psychological and Structural Factors Contributing To The
Disengagement of Non Custodial Fathers After Divorce. 30(1) Family
and Conciliation Courts Review (January 1992) pp 81-101.
# Joint resident fathers had a much higher self-esteem than fathers
receiving sole residence. Further, the fathers with joint residence
reported much more contact time with their children and higher overall
satisfaction with their parenting status.
D'Andrea A. Joint Custody Fathers: Parental Involvement and Paternal
Self- Esteem As Related To Custody Status. Dissertation Abstracts
International, 42B 2048, Order Number, AAC8124385 (1981)
# The typical custody order is where the non-custodial parent spends
four days a month with the children. Sadly, reality is that most children
of divorce rarely see their fathers. Internationally the rate of paternal
disengagement is well documented. It is estimated that over one half
of non-resident divorced fathers in the USA gradually lose all contact
with their children.
Furstenburg et al. The Life Course of Children of Divorce; Marital
Disruption and Parental Contact. 48 American Sociological Review (1983)
pp 656-668
Lund M. The Non Custodial Father; Common Challenges In Parenting
After Divorce. In C Lewis, M O'Brien (Editors), Reassessing Fatherhood.
Sage (1987) at pp 212- 224
# 42% of Australian children in sole residence had contact with
their other natural parent just once a fortnight, while 36% had contact
with their other natural parent either rarely (once per year, or less
often) or never.
Australian Bureau of Statistics 1997. Children, Australia: A Social
Report. Australian Bureau of Statistics. Catalogue 4119.0
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